It’s Not Always Smart to Push Aside Self-Talk That Doesn’t Make You Feel Good

Critical self-talk is an opportunity to increase love

Most of us dislike our negative inner voice. It tells us we aren’t good enough, smart enough, or attractive enough… It just goes on and on about how we aren’t enough. Yet, could it be in our attempts to subdue it, fix it, and ignore it we turn away a hidden gem?

It’s never pleasant to be reminded about your fears, but your internal narrator takes on the job with gusto. It can’t wait to pick apart past events and let you know where you went wrong or inform you about the many ways in which you might fail. No wonder you might find negative self-talk unhelpful.

Perhaps, though, it’s time to entertain the idea each instance of critical narrative in your mind offers a gift. The reason it’s hidden treasure stems from what it highlights. When your critical inner governor speaks, it reflects your subconscious beliefs, and your subconscious is a magic playground if you want to increase self-discovery and improve.

We so often do our best to turn away negative self-talk because we dislike what it says. Yet, not listening makes the subconscious want to shout louder. How else can it get its message across?

It’s a good idea to give negative thoughts your attention once in a while. “What?” I hear you shriek. “Aren’t we supposed to change negativity into positivity and skip through the meadow smiling?”

I’m a great fan of positive thinking. But there’s a time and place for everything, including shifting your focus from pessimism to happier thoughts. Doing so can help you get out of a downward spiral and enhance happy hormones when you need to change tack.

Nonetheless, it’s not always smart to push aside self-talk that doesn’t make you feel good. Repetitive negativity is a clear sign your subconscious wants to get in touch. It hopes you’ll change your mindset, so you can live a better life.

Repetitive negative thoughts

When your mind serves up plenty of criticism, it wants you to increase self-love. It can only show you what it contains, and it contains what you’ve put in it.

Your culture, parents, teachers, friends, associates, and even the strangers you encounter might leave a dent in your psyche. By “a dent” I mean injury. If you perceive an event as bad and feel hurt by it, the pain doesn’t go away until you address it. Mostly, this means recognizing unsolicited beliefs about lack, shame, and guilt with self-acceptance.

If self-talk implies you’re not good enough, your subconscious beliefs support the notion you are under par. You’ve picked up the idea you are substandard. The best way to manage constant critical outbursts from the deepest recesses of your psyche is to offer yourself the kindness, love, and caring you want to receive from other people.

What you want from the people around you is often what you need from yourself.

When self-talk turns sour, it might help to acknowledge your awareness of it, take a deep, soothing belly breath, and sit quietly by yourself a few moments. If your inner voice seems unkind, offer your subconscious kindness. If it’s angry, give your psyche calm. If it’s scared, offer gentleness and hope.

How? With conscious awareness. Once you’re aware of your subconscious cries, you can take the reins and use them to help you increase self-love.

Find a method that suits you and ties in with your values. Maybe, you believe affirmations are useful transformation tools, so you can create helpful ones to change negative beliefs. If affirmations turn you off, perhaps you’ll speak more directly to your subconscious with positive actions. Step-up self-care. Schedule more ‘me time’ in your diary and do things you love that make you happy.

The idea is to let your subconscious know you are valuable. You are good enough in every respect.

If your psyche is full of negativity and lack of self-regard, change its contents. Pile in messages of love until it overflows with well-being.

Copyright © 2019 Bridget Webber. All rights reserved

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Writer, poet, storyteller. Author Page Amazon

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