Young Philosophy Student Explains the Secrets of the Universe, But No One Understands Him

If you are in touch with the divine, you might though

Bridget Webber
Jan 4, 2020 · 4 min read

ip (name changed for privacy reasons) is a young philosophy student. Yet we think he already knows the secrets of the universe. The trouble is, however, no one is advanced enough to comprehend what he tells them. So we’re left in the dark.

“Kip showed signs he was advanced in knowledge and ways of thinking early on,” says his mother Frieda. “He rejected baby food in favor of broccoli. So it was obvious he knew more than most babies — more than most adults, actually, because they eat junk. Kip wouldn’t touch anything that wasn’t nutritious.”

Preferring greens to baby junk food is one thing. But having special knowledge is entirely different. I wondered how Frieda really knew Kip held the secrets of the universe, and I asked her.

“He speaks in tongues, and everybody knows only special people do that.”

Curious, I inquired what his tongue-speak sounds like.

“It’s, bear with me because it’s a foreign language to me, so explaining is difficult. It’s a lot like babble. Goo goo. Gah gah. That kind of thing. And none of us knows what it means.”

I didn’t want to offend, but thought I should mention Kip’s language sounded much like the way all babies talk.

“Exactly! We don’t understand any of them because they are far advanced compared to us adults. As we age, we slowly lose our ability to connect with the divine and talk about the knowledge hidden to older people.

It’s odd that in our society we imagine people become wiser as they get old, but the reverse is true. When you’re a baby, you still recall the heavens (if you want to call them that) and your powers diminish later.”

I wasn’t sure what to make of Frieda's announcement. Maybe she was right, and we know less than babies when we grow up.

“Yes, it’s true. Our difficulty is in communicating with youngsters before they lose their ability to tap into that divine spark. They keep sharing wisdom, but we can’t make head nor tail of it said Frieda”

I queried how we should attempt to decipher baby babble.

“Most people don’t bother because they have no idea their baby wants to communicate important information that might save the world. They make noises back, pretending to copy baby babble, but it’s clear it doesn’t make any sense because the babies just laugh at them.

My tip is to stop babbling back badly and listen. Button-up and observe your baby speak. Better still, hand him or her a crayon. Babies haven’t got the physical skills to write or draw properly yet, but one day, maybe one of them will manage to give us a clue.”

I met Kip and decided to ask him a few questions directly. This is what he said:

“Aahaa! Hoo, whoo. Aha haa ha! Burrr. Burr. Heh, heh. Mmm. Ahaa!”

I hope, sometime in the future, to understand what he tried to tell me. If anyone knows how to decipher his language, please use the comment section below to explain what he said.

Copyright © 2020 Bridget Webber. All rights reserved

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