College is Over, So Why Do I Still Want This?
After 8 years, my longing remains
Perhaps it is the fact that my old best friend
from college sent me a text that she’s starting
graduate school.
Or maybe the photos of another friend leaving
CCAC for Duquesne University and smiling
by the collegiate sign.
Perhaps it’s the fact that while I never
used my degree for what it was intended,
I loved college. The early morning classes,
warm french vanilla coffee, and sausage biscuits
from the coffee shop on the first floor of the dorms.
The discussion of literature, meeting of minds.
The feeling that the best days of our lives
are contained in those 4 years- the ones that
will teach us everything we need to know
about life, finances, our chosen subject
and having the experience of being able
to learn in a think-tank and experiment
with other students to learn what worked
and what didn’t. At the end of my years,
I didn’t have a flashy degree.
Part of the reason I’m a writer is the longing
to hold on to that part of my life:
the long term papers, required books,
loving to research and give feedback as desired.
I miss those early days and wish them back.
Without the expense, I seek out ways to continue.
