5 Ways NOT Being Part Of a Group is Actually a Good Thing
1. You can do exactly as you please.
Let’s be honest, some of us have weird tastes. Some of us like watching Ingmar Bergman’s masterpieces. Some of us don’t mind spending a bomb to get front row tickets to watch the Ra-Ga sisters perform. Some of us would like nothing more than to spend an evening learning how to sculpt or brew wine. And honestly, isn’t it irritating when your group simply can’t match your fine tastes?
2. You don’t have to put up with idiots.
There is one in every group. (Or if you’re really unlucky, more than one). These are the obnoxious, inconsiderate show-offs that always have to have their way and even though you really like your group, you hate the fact that nobody seems to have the balls to chuck ’em out, including you. BUT when you’re on your own, you can politely ask the idiots to go where the sun don’t shine.
3. You don’t have to do stuff you’re NOT interested in.
Not only do some of us want to watch Ingmar Bergman and attend organic gardening workshops, but we also DON’T want to get sloshed at that pub and we absolutely hate wearing used and unwashed military gear while having paintballs shot at us. Yeah we know it’s great fun, and we hate it. But in a group, dare say no to activities everybody else likes and you’re the spoilsport, the stick-in-the-mud, the reason nobody has fun anymore. That’s friends for you.
4. You are allowed to make new best friends
No clue how it works in your side of the town, but here, groups demand utter and complete loyalty. You can’t be swinging just because some other group is doing something you find more fun. uh-uh. Try saying, “Hey you know what — I’m going to check out what that other group is doing today, and will join you guys later…?”. You just try it man.
But if you’re solo-ing it, you belong nowhere and no one belongs to you. It’s kinda cool, and free.
5. You don’t have to invent excuses.
For some reason, saying, “I don’t want to” is simply not acceptable in a group. Try it and you’re at the receiving end of confused, strange looks from the others, as if no one’s ever heard a ‘NO’ before. You wonder why you’re being ‘asked’ for your availability in the first place. So you have to resort to coming down with a migraine or kill your distant relative or make-up a relationship issue. Jesus.
That said, having some company every now and then is fun especially when you’re doing things you really love.
Okay we’ll rephrase:
Having company is only fun when you’re doing something you really love.
Because the important thing is to have fun first by yourself, enjoy yourself. Everyone and everything else is a bonus.
If you’re the kind who’s never yet found the right company for things you like, you should check out Brigge. We have people there, you know — like you. Doing weird shit like you. And hey, if you like it wingin’ it solo — you go girl! Rock on.