Brighton Council Plan To Tackle Bus Strike With Replacement Hoverboard Service

In a shock proposal to combat the impending bus strike, Thames Govia the parent company for Brighton Bus and Southern Rail has suggested replacing all services with hoverboards. Many pensioners are furious and baffled at the proposal, the latest in a long line of miscalculations from the company.

Doris, 79 years young, has relied on the bus ever since they were invented 30 years ago to replace horses. She never dreamt in a million years that she would be encouraged to hop on a hoverboard to make it to her destination. But this will be reality now for many pensioners caught up in the impending bus strike.

The bus service which is owned by the same company as Southern Rail released a statement “We pushed a few ideas about the table, hot air balloon, zorbs even bringing the horses back but the one that really excited me was the hoverboard! I think they could replace the bus entirely! When the strike is done with we might get to keep the boards! Christmas has come early”.

Hoverboards, which don’t even hover, have become a cultural phenomenon in recent months with celebrity’s such as Keith Chegwin taking to the streets to tout their benefits.

“I think it’s gonna be great for OAPs, it strengthens the core muscles and if they’re statue stiff suffering from arthritis, the OAP can be titled forward, let go and will continue in a straight line. We could be sending hundred up the sea front every hour” one representative said.

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