BRIGHXIT: Brighton Independence Referendum Gains Traction

Do the People’s Republic Of Brighton and Hove have a new mandate to declare themselves an independent entity? More and more Brighton residents seems to think so.

Campaigners have been inspired by the Scottish bid for a second referendum and also the Isle Of Whites escape to freedom 50million years ago when it was once attached to mainland England.

The idea for independence formed initially during the last couple of elections when Brighton realised that they were surrounded by a sea of blue (Conservative constituencies).

The plan originally was to construct a huge wall to prevent any Right Wing monsters despoiling the flower of the south coast. But realising they were already in a sea of blue, they have opted on separating completely with explosives and heat cutters placed in specific regions around Brighton’s boarders, unleashing the area into the sea to float as its own Island.

When asked if they are copying The Isle Of White, it was dismissed that “we’re nothing like them, they wear double denim un-ironically”.

We asked some residents what they thought:

“We’ve had it up to our tits with the twats up north between Scotland and Horsham. If the prices of Chickpeas rise then that’s pretty much a declaration of war to me” said one Brightonian pedestrian.

“We’re thinking of hanging a flag from the i360 to show we’re serious but no one can agree on a flag, we know it needs to be made of hemp but we’re undecided whether it should be green or rainbow coloured”.

Let us know what you think.