“The Four Keys”: Chapter 4

Sheily Shah

It is Sunday morning after the final Closing Ceremony. The halls of the hotel are filled with chatter, laughter, and tears. Attendees are wearing their new YJA Convention t-shirts, and after the all-nighter, they have a frenzied energy. Cars are coming to shuttle people to the airport, suitcases are being rolled across the floors, and people are hugging each other, sharing phone numbers and saying their final goodbyes for the weekend.

Sam, Arushi, and Neel find each other by the entrance of the convention center, dark circles enveloping their bright eyes, still determined to win the scavenger hunt.

Atam sees them from across the hall and walks up to them, his shoulders sunken, almost in defeat.

There are three people for three keys. There is no fourth clue given, but the fourth key has to be here somewhere. The weekend is ending, and if he doesn’t find it now, he will lose them forever.

“Where’s the last clue?” Neel says. “Are you sure you didn’t misplace it somewhere?”

“I’ll be honest,” Atam replies. “These clues just appeared for me.” Sam, Neel, and Arushi look at him with confusion. “I know, it sounds weird, but the four keys are actually mine. I’ve always had them.”

“Why?” Arushi asks. “What do they do?”

“I’m not sure,” Atam responds. “I’ve had them forever.” He recounts the experience with the voice in his head, his own voice shaking nervously. “This is absurd, but I think he was right. I think I need them to survive.”

“So just to be clear,” Sam reflects back to him. “You need four keys to survive, you don’t know why, and you were only given three clues to find them. Maybe there’s a clue for the fourth key in one of the first three clues you gave us.”

Arushi puts her key on the floor and they all sit down, cross-legged in a circle. “Let’s backtrack our steps,” she says. “Neel, where were you when you found the first key?”

“I was at the keynote speaker,” Neel says. “I remember the speaker gave me the key when she dropped her nametag.”

“Did she say anything to you when she gave it?” Arushi asks.

“No, but I remember she looked at me during the speech,” he said. “I remember she looked just like my grandmother, and she passed away a few years ago. She said something my grandmother always used to say, and that was the first moment in two years I felt like I had accepted my grandmother’s death, instead of being angry at it.”

“You got the clarity key!” Atam says. “I think you got the key when you realized that!”

Sam excitedly speaks up. “Okay, so we need to think about what we realized when we got our keys. Arushi, what did you learn?”

Arushi stands quietly. She’s confused. “Some auntie gave me my key with my mango lassi after Garba. I’m not sure I had any deep realization. I was exhausted though”

“Think back to your day,” Neel says. “Did you feel like something was missing before you found the key?”

“I remember meeting someone who didn’t know how to do Garba,” she said. “I thought it was strange, but after teaching him, we had a conversation about our experiences with Jainism in India. But, I don’t think I realized anything about myself there.”

“Was your experience with Jainism in India similar to your experience here?” Sam asks.

“No, not at all.” Arushi said. “In an earlier session, I couldn’t even respond to a question in the session I was in because I felt like I knew so much less than everyone, despite being constantly immersed in Jain education throughout my childhood in Mumbai.”

“Maybe that was your realization,” Neel said. “Maybe being here and learning how other people practice Jainism was it?”

Sam looks down at her key. “Your key has a pen, and the pages of a book. If the first one represented clarity, this would could represent knowledge. Maybe it’s signifying a new journey to understanding Jain knowledge.”

couldn’t even respond to a question in the session I was in because I felt like I knew so much less than everyone, despite being constantly immersed in Jain education throughout my childhood in Mumbai.”

“Maybe that was your realization,” Neel said. “Maybe being here and learning how other people practice Jainism was it?”

Sam looks down at her key. “Your key has a pen, and the pages of a book. If the first one represented clarity, this would could represent knowledge. Maybe it’s signifying a new journey to understanding Jain knowledge.”

Atam nods. They’re on the right track, and he’s in awe of the moments of self-discovery he was hearing. It was Sam’s turn.

“My key is just big and bright.” Sam says. “No context clues there. But I got this key at speed dating.”

“Speed dating?” Arushi is puzzled. “What did you do there?”

Sam reflects back on the sticky note wall. “I’m gay,” he says, out loud in a Jain setting for the first time. “I was nervous for speed dating, I didn’t know how they would match us up, but there was an activity where we had to put something we’re afraid of, and I remember being afraid that I was the only one.”

Atam looks at him and said “Were you?”

“No, actually.” Sam says. “I got my key when a sticky note fell off the wall, but I think it was when I realized that I wasn’t alone. I distanced myself from anything related to Jainism until this weekend, but seeing that other people in our community have so many different identities made me want to learn more.”

“What would you want to learn?” Neel asks.

“I think I want to understand more about how compassionate of a religion Jainism is,” he says. “I was always overwhelmed by the rules and rituals, but at the end of the day, the community we’re in is so diverse. I want people younger than me to realize this.”

Atam smiled. “Your key represents energy, and effort. You want to put in more effort to understanding Jain values.”

Everyone looked at Atam.

“I think it’s your turn to realize something,” Arushi says. “That’s the fourth key.”

Atam took all three keys and held them in his hands. For the first time, he took a deep sigh and felt the anxiety melt away. He had so much to learn from the three keyholders. The voice was right, he needed the four to look inwards, and survive. But he didn’t need four physical keys. He needed a reminder of these journeys.

He felt the keys getting warmer until suddenly, each of the keys broke off a new piece, on its own, almost effortlessly. The keys glowed in his hands and each piece came together into one. It was sparkly, golden and smooth. He held the key tightly in his hand. It was the fourth key.

“This key is bliss. It’s the last attribute. You all had it with you the whole time,” Atam says. “Contentment is always with us, we just have to seek it. Each of you had to have your own journeys to feel some amount of contentment.”

He puts the fourth key in his pocket and gives the three keys back to their respective seekers. “I don’t need all of these to survive anymore,” he says. The four of them walk away, back to their own hometowns and lives, each with a key in their hand.