How we steward each others’ growth
If we don’t want to be told what to do at work, how can we be guided in our growth? Who takes care of our development? We call the answer to these questions: stewarding. It is a concept of peer-to-peer support for the personal and professional growth of individuals within the company.
What this support entails
Stewards support their stewardees by…
- fostering personal and professional growth
- serving as a sparring partner
- putting a human face on talking to ‘the organization’
- offering a safe haven for retreat
What it looks like in practice
In practice, stewarding looks like two people talking while sitting in a room, taking a walk, or on a video call. I find it helpful to start out with one hour per week transitioning into 0.5h — 1h every 2–4 weeks depending on the stewardee’s needs.
I guide the conversation using general coaching practices like asking questions, listening, mirroring, summarizing, sharing observations, and empathizing. The specific practices I personally know and value are systemic coaching, clean language, and nonviolent communication.
I take notes during or after sessions to keep a log of topics we talked about. These notes help me pick up the thread in future sessions and to get an overview of topics we covered. I highlight topics I want to come back to later. I share my notes digitally with my stewardee so they may review them as well if they like. I describe the structure of these notes below.
What to talk about
I cluster the topics we discuss in 3 areas with 3 sub-areas each.
Impact
- Are you clear about the goals you are aiming for? Are these your goals or someone else’s? What is your long game?
- Are you clear about the next step in your development? Is it actionable? Do you have the necessary resources?
- Are you clear about what motivates you? What gives you energy? What drains it?
Leadership
- Are you clear about your role(s) and mandates? Which responsibilities and privileges have been given to you?
- Are you clear about how to relate, influence, and interact with your team? How much weight does your opinion carry? When do others seek out your input?
- Are you clear about how to relate, influence, and interact with the organization? What is your niche?
Well-being
- Are you clear and calm? Are you engaged? Can you handle uncertainty and complexity? Can you explain your thinking?
- Are you content? What is your baseline mood? How easily are you triggered?
- Are you feeling healthy and strong? Do you have energy throughout the day?
If a stewardee can answer yes to these nine questions, we are good. I believe that clarity and progress in these 9 areas lead to fulfillment and that contentment with the current step and past progress results in happiness.
How I guide sessions
As a steward, I see my task in guiding my stewardee’s reflection while the contents of the sessions are provided by them. A simple path tracking metaphor helps me to keep this task present: I support my stewardee by nudging them to get going, by keeping track, by pointing out forks in the path, by encouraging them to keep going, and by letting them know when it’s time to come to an end.
To get going, I tend to do one of the following.
- Often a session just needs a “What’s alive in you right now?” to kick off and we’ll take it from there.
- Or I might offer something I highlighted in my notes that I find interesting to dig deeper into.
- If the stewardee identified an action to take in the previous session, I follow up on it. This way I act as an accountability partner and support the stewardee in following through on their plans.
- Sometimes, I offer a quick recap of the previous session to jog our memories. This often sparks topics to continue or something that has changed since the last session that is interesting to discuss.
- From time to time, we go through the 9 areas above to assess where they currently are. I sometimes vary the question format from “Are you clear …?” to “On a scale from 0 to 10 how clear are you …?”
- And occasionally, I bring an exercise to have a more structured session about a specific topic. More on that below.
Once a session and the stewardee’s reflection are underway, I ask probing questions in areas where I sense a lack of clarity. When the stewardee does actual thinking instead of expressing preconceived opinions, it is easy to get lost. This often leads to “Erm… how did I get here?” The role of a steward is to keep track of the path of thinking and the sequence of conclusions. This way I can mirror it back to my stewardee and enable deeper understanding.
Keeping track is a prerequisite to point out forks in the path that we haven’t explored yet but may be beneficial to gain a more complete picture.
I notice when my stewardee has stopped on the path and encourage them to keep going. This can be as simple as “Tell me more.” or even just to endure some silence to give my stewardee some time to think.
When we near the end of our session, I point out that we have 5 minutes left. I encourage them to come to a close for today and ask if there is anything my stewardee needs to wrap up this session in a way that makes it feel complete.
Clarifying expectations upfront
In the first session, I explain my expectations about our stewarding relationship.
- I want this to be a relationship on eye level. I am not your teacher or boss (in this setting).
- This is about you and your growth, not a status report about your work.
- I will treat everything that is said in this space confidentially.
- My job is not to develop you. My job is to support you in your development.
I find it helpful to discuss these questions with the stewardee:
- What are your expectations for our stewarding relationship?
- What is your most important growth objective, and how can I help you realize it? (What do you need me for?)
- What criteria will you use to assess whether my contribution to your growth has been successful?
- What, if any, historical tensions or systemic barriers have made it difficult for people in a “stewarding-like” role to fulfill your expectations? What is it that is getting in our way?
Note-taking structure
When I meet with someone in person, I take notes on an iPad. In my experience, this creates less distance than typing on a laptop. In remote sessions, I take notes in a shared document, so the stewardee may also take notes and it becomes a collaborative effort.
In my hand-written notes, I use the icons and color-coding of the 9 areas above in a column on the left. When reviewing my notes, this helps me quickly spot areas we might have missed so far or are avoiding.
In my note-taking, I don’t strive for completeness or clarity. They are not meant to be a transcript or summary of the sessions but rather reminders of interesting realizations and potential points to follow up on or review.
Occasionally, I doodle a visualization of a concept that is discussed. This helps me with sense-making.
Exercises
Every once in a while, I bring a more structured approach to a session, if I feel that the stewardee could make a leap in a certain area. I am eager to extend this list of exercises. Let me know if you have any that you think might be suitable.
General
- Journaling
Goals
Steps
- How have you grown this past year? How have you contributed to the company this past year?
- How are the 8 different kinds of intelligences developed in you? How could you use these intelligences more effectively in your work?
Motivators
Mind
Mood
- Read the Core Nonviolent Commitments. Which of these resonate with you? Which don’t? Which of these do you struggle with? Which come easy?
- Answer the Gallup Q12 questions. Do you feel engaged with the company?
How does stewarding relate to…?
Mentoring is about helping others grow in a specific area of expertise in which you have more experience than they do. Mentoring can be a part of stewarding but doesn’t have to.
Coaching is about helping others figure out what they want and how to get there. This is a component in stewarding, but stewarding is often more specific about the context of the current work environment and role.
Leadership is about taking responsibility for the achievement of a goal and attracting others to volunteer their efforts. As a steward, my goal is to increase people’s abilities and agency and with that their effectiveness within our self-organized company.
🙏 Prior art: I first read about the concept of stewarding in Loomio’s handbook.
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