Being a “pro” at losing in the game of life.

I was barely 15 when my cat died. I had lost a friend, a companion and most importantly a part of myself. Seven days later my grandma sends a letter. Although, she had come to visit a few days before but I didn’t choose to meet her as I had locked myself up in my room drowning in my own sadness.

And this is exactly what my grandma’s letter for the fifteen year old me read:

Dear Angel,
Today is the time in your life where you have to be a pro at losing. I know, all these years your parents, teachers and infact the world taught you on how to win but today I am telling you why it is important to lose; not once, not twice but at many times in your life. Losing is sometimes better than winning.

Of all these years of my life, I have lost a lover to someone else, lost my youth to old age, lost your grandfather to death, lost a friend because of distance and lost a part of me to cancer. Even today I haven’t stop losing; all the memories I have are being lost with time. If I look back, everything slipped by as the sand that slips by from your clenched fist,no matter how hard you try to hold it, its going to slip away.

My girl, never be afraid to lose things and never be afraid to lose a part of yourself. Whenever my dear you would fall weak and try to catch on the things meant to be lost, you would be in pain.

Indeed, you would tell me that there is pain in letting go but trust me girl the pain of keeping it to yourself will always be more. My dear, let go off that friend who talks behind your back, remove that impacted wisdom tooth ASAP to ease the pain and do not be in a relationship that cannot provide you happiness.

Cause honey, I had a choice to keep your grandfather with me but I choose to remove the ventilator support. The pain of losing him to death was worth it rather than trying to keep him with me. Watching him lifeless everyday would have been more painful.

So what you gotta do with the pain of having lost? Defeat it. The pain that you have of losing yourself must lose. Be a pro at accepting the loss and at letting go of the pain.

Life teaches you to lose. So be such a great loser that you lose all the pain that you have of losing.

Go out girl and buy a dog or any pet that you like and lose your pain to new found happiness.

Even today, I read it before attending her funeral. Time to be a loser again.

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