Fear of Writing
Fear of Writing
The endless mind dance of the writer.
Here I am.
Again.
I’ve written several novels.
They have been published.
And yet, here I am again, afraid of writing.
It’s not some mysterious ‘block’ that people sometimes seek medical attention for.
Oh no, I know exactly what it is.
It’s fear.
I’m afraid of immersing myself in the world that I am trying to create.
I’m afraid of being confronted with the many inadequacies of my book.
I’m afraid of defeat. I’m afraid I won’t like it. I’m afraid I won’t be able to solve all the problems I have created. I’m afraid I won’t be inspired. I’m afraid.
Here I sit, again, at the edge of the river of creative flow.
And I’m afraid.
So many woundings in the past. So much ridicule, so much rejection (the latest only yesterday). So much need for healing.
I know I will find some of that healing in the book. If only…
Time to start writing. Slowly. Slowly with the fear.
Fear is my companion.
I don’t want to kick her around. I don’t want to scream at her. I don’t want to reject here. Here’s my hand.
Fear will be my friend.
Come, friend, let’s explore together. We’ll go as slowly as you need.
