How to Practice Primal Therapy in your Living Room
This morning, I unleashed a pretty serious scream in my living room expecting to dislodge some pent-up emotion. But as I’ve discovered in the past, it didn’t provide much relief, just concern that I hurt my vocal chords or my neighbors think I’ve lost my shit again.
I want screaming to work. Or punching a pillow (which I find equally ineffective). Both are cheaper and quicker than talk therapy. Plus it stands to reason that physicalizing your emotions should release energy on a deeper level than traditional “talking head” therapy, right?
Primal Therapy (a trendy trauma-based psychotherapy from the 70’s) maintains this type of core-level approach is more effective. Creator Arthur Janov believes that most neuroses is caused by the repressed pain of childhood trauma that gets stuck in the body.
“I have come to regard that scream as the product of central and universal pains which reside in all neurotics,” says Janov.
“I call them Primal Pains because they are the original, early hurts upon which all later neurosis is built. It is my contention that these pains exist in every neurotic each minute of his later life, irrespective of the form of his neurosis.
These pains often are not consciously felt because they are diffused throughout the entire system where they affect body organs, muscles, the blood and lymph system and, finally, the distorted way we behave.”
And I totally get that. The body seems like an obvious dumping ground for emotional baggage. How many old hurts do we physically carry around with us on a daily basis? What areas of chronic pain are actually chronic psychic pain instead? And how does internalization of emotion affect our overall health?
Once my friend Paulina grabbed my neck, as if to pretend throttle me for some silly comment I made. Instead of laughing, I burst into tears the moment her hands met my skin. Without me knowing, my bare neck was rife with emotion and vulnerability. It just needed human touch to release it.
And let’s not forget the power of a good cry.
As someone who can barely tolerate life on any given day, crying is cheap and easy therapy. Who doesn’t feel better after a good cry? Afterwards I’m able to take that ultra-deep inhale and exhale out about 15 pounds of chronic upset.
Catharsis. Release. How can we survive in this fucked up world without it? In the movie Broadcast News, Holly Hunter’s character, a hard-working TV producer, starts every day off with a perfunctory cry to ground herself for the stressful day ahead. Which sounds smart, doesn’t it? A psychic cleaning to start your day and keep you sane and healthy.
Deeper pain needs to be physicalized, not just discussed. Whether its screaming, crying, shouting, kicking, punching, running, wrestling, writhing, singing, fucking, shitting, spitting, growling — that shit has got to come out!
I’ll continue my search for healing that affects my whole being, not just my frenetic head. Because we are our bodies as much as we are our brains. Both need healed at any given time. Take the immortal advice of Tears for Fears and…