“Your Future For a Dollar…”
A leathery wrinkled man in ragged, dirty clothes, ragged, dirty hair and no shoes stopped me on my stroll to work. Told me with one eye twitching and the other wide open but looking elsewhere, that he could tell me my future for a dollar. I gave him two and requested that he give it to me straight.
He took both dollars and slipped them into a secret pocket somewhere in his torn up shirt.
“The planets are in a sinister position today,” he began, looking up, far into the universe. I wasn’t sure if he was talking to me or just thinking out loud. “The orbits of Jupiter and Venus, the two rebellious children of our mother, the Sun, lie in a straight line. They are scheming.”
“Are you sure they’re scheming? Maybe they’re just catching u — —
“Hold your tongue child, as the universe can hear your profanities!”
“Apologies. Go on.” I said, eager to get my money’s worth.
“The moon, oh divine courtesan, has whispered to me of Venus’ unruly intent to lay undue discomfort upon us. She watches over us, you know, looking out into the stars, catching wind of any rumors of wrongdoing aimed at us. She, with all her grace and seductive might, has smelled out Jupiter’s nasty plan to cause nuisance upon all who go too jolly about life.”
“So what has her decadent majesty whispered about me?” I asked the intriguing man who now had his eyes closed, maintaining his sublime connection with the cosmos.
His shriveled hand floated towards the sky, bony index finger aiming at the looming dark cloud above us. “It’s gonna rain today,” he said. “And you’re gonna burn your tongue with hot coffee. I’m sorry.” He turned and limped away, scratching his thick, gray forest of hair.
That was a few hours ago. My tongue is currently burned and numb.
Now I should make it clear to the reader that the culprit of this nuisance wasn’t prepared or purchased by me, but by a generous coworker who bought a round of cappuccinos for everyone. Mine was the only one that came scorching hot.
Also, it’s starting to rain.
