Dummies Guide To Wake Up Early.

five highly efficient ways to wake up in the morning.

Kritarth Srinivasan
The Comic Curry
4 min readJul 20, 2018

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Majority of the people I know have a problem getting to sleep at night. It’s often the hectic work life, the lack of a body clock or as simple as a social media addiction. However, this is never a problem for me. My only roadblock to falling asleep at night is when my flatmates go on a Netflix marathon. This now puts me in a spot. Should I stay awake and follow the show, or fall asleep and hear a bad narrative-recap of what I missed? So like I said, falling asleep is not a problem. Getting up, harder than convince a dog to do the moonwalk.

“I’m so good at this, I can do it in my sleep”, I’ve only used this expression to describe my talents in sleeping. I use an alarm to wake up, of course. But as of the past few weeks, I’ve been switching them off in my sleep… I’m a sleep Ninja. I needed a way to wake up early. I did my research and narrowed it down to these five kick-ass ways tricks. Feel free to use them if you are anything like me.

1. Ask mom to call.

Works.evert.time. Ask her to call me on my phone and 90-percent of the times, I’m awake. I kid you not, Mothers are the best alarm clock. They are efficient, punctual and find ways to make you do things you hate. The best thing about Momarm (a clever portmanteau of the words mom and alarm, thanks!) is that there is no defined snooze time. There is no ‘off button’ either. My mother makes it a point to call again in 10 minutes to make sure I did not go back to sleep and miss my flight. She sometimes even plays her trump card, asking my retire-air-force-pilot dad to call and wake me up. His voice has always put sleepy me into attention right away.

2. Buy a baby monitor.

If one of your problems is turning the alarm off and going back into slumber, make it hard yourself. Place your phone in the kitchen. Place the transmitter unit of the baby monitor next to the phone. Place the receiver unit of the same next to your bed. When the alarm rings in the morning, there is no off-button at arms reach. You are thereby forced to walk across your living space to shut the alarm up (STAU). You may also place a glass of cold-brew-coffee in the fridge and chug it right after you turn the alarm off. You may replace the coffee with chill powder, espresso shots or cough syrup for better impact.

3. A treasure hunt.

For this to be a success, you will need to live in a house with other people. Friends or family, either will do! Before you set an alarm on your phone, ask your flatmate/family member to add a pin lock to your phone. Once you are asleep, ask your flatmate/family member to leave a chit on your bedside, next to the phone. The chit will contain the first clue to the treasure hunt. The last clue of the hunt should be the four-digit-pin to open your phone. This is not only a certain way to wake you up, also a adds a sense of adventure to the waking up every morning.

4. Live in a TamBram house.

This situation, much like color blindness… you have to be born with it. I’ve grown up in a Tamil Brahmin house. Here if your alarm fails, your grandmother will not. TamBram grandmoms wakes up with the sole motivation to play Bhajans every morning. Some people need a dose of caffeine in the morning, elderly tams need a strong dose of Sri Venkateshwara Suprabhatam. Preferably, in the voice of MS Subbulakshmi. In our house, the sunrise was not a definitive of the morning, this was. The twenty minutes long sanskari-rap-song make the blood flow in reverse in our bodies. Thanks to this, we wake up every morning like it was Christmas morning.

5. Food delivery app

This might seem bizarre, but it’s a foolproof process. I’ve even used this multiple time last month. They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day because you spent the last eight hours doing nothing (weird!). If you, like me, live in a metropolitan and use food delivery this is ideal. Most food apps these days come with a “Schedule delivery” option. All you need to do it order breakfast and schedule it for the time you want to wake up. Leave it to the delivery person to ring the doorbell and make sure you up and wake. Trust me with this one.

Screenshot from SwiggyApp

If you are anything like me and have trouble waking up before lunchtime, this is sure going to change your life.
I’ve put all these to practical use and now all morning to watch Netflix, you can too!

If you use any of them, PLEASE tweet to me. I would love to hear.

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Kritarth Srinivasan
The Comic Curry

Writer of Fun(ny) things, for brands and people. Follow my Series: "Life-Hacks-You-Dont-Need"