Fuck The Weak and The Ugly
Against “Strong is Beautiful” Messaging
I. The Message is Oppresive
We are oppressed when our value is defined as a function of our physicality. Whether it is our sexual allure, our ability to bear and raise children, or our usefulness in the workforce, we give away ownership of our bodies the moment we buy into any narrative that promotes a hierarchy based on physical value. This is a feminist issue because body politics affect those who present as female with disproportionate severity, but it is also a broader human rights issue.
The “Strong is Beautiful” tagline is presented to us as an alternative to docile femininity, and thus is accepted as a feminist stance and a pillar for empowering young girls. In reality it is just another backhanded judgement for how people should look and feel. It does nothing to free those who identify as masculine from their own problematic relationship to physical strength, and instead drags us deeper into the false binary.
For all of the other problems we face at this moment, women needing permission to participate in physical activity is not one of them. So, if we already have permission to maintain our health through exercise, then what is the “strong is beautiful” narrative really about? Who is it for, and what is it trying achieve?
Proponents of this narrative (who likely aim to profit off of deodorant sales and books about raising “tough girls”) would argue it is about creating equality by telling people that it’s OK to subvert feminine expectations.
That is nonsense. It is nonsense because we wouldn’t need to be told that it’s good to be strong if we weren’t being told the opposite elsewhere, so all you REALLY need to say is “oh yeah, you can ignore all that stuff about being delicate. IT’S NONSENSE.” To create a counter-narrative to something that we shouldn’t be validating to begin with is neither productive nor does it bring peace.
But wait, there’s more! Just because the sale of “strong is beautiful” is pointless, doesn’t mean that it can’t also be incredibly damaging.
II. The Message is Harmful
To equate strength to beauty is to signal to that anyone who is disabled, or sick, or suffering from a mental illness, or even just uncoordinated, that they are already out of the running. It tells anyone who is exhausted from working to make ends meet (when their income is being funneled into the hands of greedy landlords and real estate investors) that really, if they want to be valued, they just need to work a little harder- that they would be happier if they were STRONG as opposed to just doing what they can to keep their head above water.
How does someone who doesn’t actually have time or energy or a comfortable living situation embark on this heroic journey towards physical excellence? By buying a bunch of stuff that probably doesn’t work or will mostly sit unused in a box, and then buy more when they forget that it’s there. Naturally.
“Strength Is Beauty” messaging propagates the bootstrap myth and tells us we can do ANYTHING we put our mind to if we just work hard enough, and that we will be better for it in the end when really there is little chance one won’t just end up exhausted and injured and in debt. It presents strength as something that anyone can achieve- equality is just a few squat thrusts away! This is a charming narrative but unfortunately it is completely unattainable for the majority of population in all modern societies through no fault of their own. It is not helping anyone but the people who are selling health books and exercise regimens.
If there is anything redeeming about the Beauty/Strength narrative it is that it encourages women to view the ability to defend themselves in a positive light in the hopes of narrowing the advantages that gave men the upper hand in the olden-days. Except that’s also a myth- it isn’t physical strength but reproductive vulnerability that accelerated inequality. Either way, when a violent person has their mind set on attacking someone, strength is rarely the defining factor of how much harm that attack causes. We are less at risk of being attacked by another civilian than we are of being oppressed by a system that runs on our energy, our bodies, and our anxieties. To spend any time fixating on what kind of body will increase our social capital is a perversion of our own interests.
III. The Message is Backwards
Beauty is often placed at the center of discussions surrounding feminism and empowerment in an attempt to unburden women from the male gaze, but these attempts to “reclaim” the word do not help us subvert the forces that are causing the most harm. To position beauty as a central theme in our value system while trying to improve that system is a mistake. I don’t know much about engineering but I’m pretty sure that when a structure is rotting you have to tear it down. Painting it a different color and adding some new details isn’t going to do much.
If we could discuss openly that some people are more pleasurable to behold than others the same way that we can appreciate the visual pleasure of one sunset or bridge over another without assigning disproportional value to that pleasure then we wouldn’t have a problem. To try to redefine the word does not remove the reality of our aesthetic preferences. As it is there is so much value placed on beauty that it is far too painful for most of us to imagine that we might not be beautiful. We would rather search for the definition that validates us than break down everything that makes beauty important.
In a perfect world, our imagined value in society at large would not matter if we had unconditional support and accountability within our communities. Value would change based on the needs of each group, and it would be up to everyone to teach each other and keep each other in check and work to correct for our worst instincts. But that’s not where we are, so we are left with this very painful reality, and we strive to find any way we can to control how we are perceived, and how we view ourselves if for no other reason than to avoid being swallowed by despair.
IV. The Message Is Confusing
“Smart is beautiful!” “Everyone is beautiful!” “Big is Beautiful” “Kindness is beautiful!” “Happiness is beautiful!” “Strong is Beautiful!”
These are all phrases that show up in marketing, in popular culture, and in early education disguised as an attempt to bolster self-esteem. While they all separately have some troubling implications to unpack, the actual outcome of ALL of these definitions being used simultaneously is that they cancel each other out and the word itself remains as it was- a measure of the pleasure derived from the aesthetic senses.
One might argue that these definitions can exist simultaneously and do not negate each other. That is true if what you’re trying to say is that none of those definitions should stop one from being considered beautiful, but from a semantic standpoint a word can only hold so much symbolic weight before it implodes. When we define beauty in vague terms we don’t define it at all.
If beauty is strength AND happiness AND kindness AND intelligence etc… then beauty has no specific meaning and remains just as open to interpretation as it was before. If I can say “strong is beautiful” under the premise that beauty can be defined however I see fit, then someone can just as easily come through and say “submissive is beautiful”. No one is wrong and no one is right and everyone is frustrated.
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V. The Message Is Ignorant
At best, those who buy into the strength narrative are living in a la-la land where they truly believe that everyone is able-bodied and has tons of time and money for recreation. At worst, they know this is not true, and have decided not to care.
Here are just a few *minor* complications:
- Athletics and exercise are a luxury that many Americans cannot afford.
- Strength is a product. While only the individual can “achieve” it for themselves, it is an idea that can be sold to us in a box.
- When the media tries to define beauty they aim to subvert our autonomy for corporate gain.
- The pursuit of strength is not always healthy. Especially, when we focus on aesthetics over function we often damage our joints, our hearts, our minds, and everything in between.
It is unlikely that the “Strength is Beauty” message and it’s related narratives are going anywhere, but we have the power to ignore them and to consider deeply what we are really doing when we concede that human beauty is meaningful. This is not to say that we should deny our base instincts—denying that we are drawn to the beauty of others is not a reasonable goal. What we can do though is aggressively block the messaging that wants to use our relationship to beauty to control our behavior. Your body does not exist for someone else to profit off of whether it is beautiful or not.

