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When Healing Makes You “Less Ambitious”
Have we lost our drive — or just found something better?
A few weeks ago, my mother looked at me across the dinner table and said, “You’re not as ambitious as you used to be.”
She didn’t say it with judgment, just quiet observation, maybe even a little concern. And I knew exactly what she meant. A few years ago, I was always striving — pushing for more, for bigger, for better. I measured my worth in achievements, in productivity, in how many hours I could sacrifice to the pursuit of success.
Now, I move differently. My goals are softer, my pace is slower, and the things I once obsessed over don’t hold the same weight.
But does that mean I’ve lost ambition? Or have I simply redefined it?
The Shift That Feels Like Losing Drive
When we enter a healing journey, most of us are not aware of how deeply we’ve tied our worth to external validation. We’ve spent years — sometimes a lifetime — chasing things outside of ourselves to prove we are enough.
This need to prove ourselves is so ingrained that we don’t even question it. We’re constantly achieving, stretching ourselves thin, chasing the next milestone. And the world rewards us for it. We get praised for our drive, our…
