Co-house: How to Survive the Bay Area

Dear Ollie,

How do I survive the Bay Area? Can you give me some advice. I live in the Bay Area and own my own home. My husband and I work and have good jobs but we still can’t get ahead. The banks say that we look good on paper but our debt ratio is high due to our student loans and previous debt from a time when one of us was out of work. We have two small kids and have done extra hours but that only keeps us away from home and adds more stress on the family. Plus, add in the cost of babysitting and we are still not getting ahead. What do you advise to get us ahead?

Helpless in Bay Area

Dear Helpless,

First of all you are not alone or helpless. Times are tough and many people are asking and going through the same things you are. This is the time to think creatively. You have options only you don’t see them, yet.

The traditionalists will say the following: Watch how you spend, continue the rat race that you are on, buckle down and try harder. Borrow from family and friends. No vacations, no eating out, no extras. Live on one income. I’m sure you’ve tried many of those things already and it is not working for you. Let’s face it, excluding the upper middle class and rich and those with the unique talent to live on one income and buckle down and live as minimalist, the rest of us find the the Bay Area a hard place to live.

There are others that will say: Sell your house, cut your losses, move out of the Bay Area or Sell and rent. Two things on that one.

First: Sell and move out of the Bay Area: are you going to keep the job you have in the Bay Area? Then that’s added driving 2hrs? or in an area that has poor schools? Either way, doesn’t serve the family best. Outside of the Bay Area the incomes are generally lower or maybe you’ve chosen the Bay Area because you love it or your friends and family are here.

How about the other option, sell your home and rent. Okay, you could do that but then you are at the mercy of the landlord. It will work if you happen not to have pets, find a good landlord, and are not in the Bay Area.

Which leads us into Creative New Option: Co-House.

Let’s start with reality. All options are hard. This one on the outside looks like the hardest. Co-house. Sounds strange. Most people would walk away and say “those are crazy words”. You aren’t most people. If you want to make it and not be one of the people gets lost to the system and can’t get ahead, then listen up. For a some discomfort at first this is what you get. You get to keep the home you love. Less disruption to the family and you find a family in a similar situation. The upswing: the other family pays half the mortgage, but gets a part of your home (the second living room, the basement?), share of the kitchen, share of the bathroom. The real upside to this is as a parent you can work things out and get another set of eyes. You have now formed a community. You can work together and help each other out and both your kids and this other family kids will be better off because of this because there is more parental guidance. A little discomfort but what do you get in return? Freedom to live and make it in this uncertain world. Or lets put a price on it. For a $3,500 month mortgage, $1,500 a month rent with 1/2 utilities and another set of hands around the house. In exchange you give up your second living room and a bedroom? Think about it. This is the way to survive creatively. How do I know it will work? Because I’m doing it.

Ollie