Humans of San Francisco

I moved here a little over 2 years ago from sunny, friendly San Diego for a job opportunity. I’d never lived in a busy city in the US, I didn’t know many people here, and I didn’t know what to expect.

You know how animals can sense your fear? I soon learned that a city can similarly sense your wariness. Just as a friendly pet dog won’t nuzzle you when you’re secretly terrified of it, a new city won’t be kind to you when you expect it to be difficult.

And did San Francisco act difficult! In my first month, a drunk homeless guy punched me on the arm for no reason. Coffee shop baristas didn’t greet me as cheerfully as they did in San Diego. Men flaked on dates. The people I met through work or activities were pleasant but new friendships were tenuous because everyone had a lot going on already. In short, while I really enjoyed the cultural events and the occasional hike, the coldness of relationships San Francisco left me feeling disgruntled and yearning for my old life in San Diego.

But then just when I thought I had reached a point of apathy, something shifted. I began to notice kind deeds all around me. Some that were directed at me, some at random strangers, some directed at nobody in particular.

• The stranger who fed my parking meter when I didn’t have coins and asked me to pay it forward
• My leasing office staff who wrote out 300 Valentine’s day notes overnight and stuck it on each resident’s door
• The Acme Bread Company van driver who slowed down to hand out a fresh loaf to a beggar
• The native Frenchman who is passionately working to beautify the neighborhood park just so that “people can enjoy looking at it”
• The construction worker who had just sat down to rest outside an apartment complex but immediately jumped up to open the gate for a lady
• The generosity that brought the bay lights back to life (I cried when they went off in March’15 and again when they came back on in Jan’16!)

These are just a few instances off the top of my head. But after the latest act I witnessed today, where a homeless guy rushed to move a windblown street-sign away from oncoming traffic, I felt a renewed sense of optimism and gratitude towards this weird city that’s always surprising me. I’m glad I moved here and gave the city a chance to work its magic on me. And I believe that’s an attitude worth applying to other aspects of life as well.