The Creative Cafe
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The Creative Cafe

What are you waiting for?

What are you waiting for? It’s Saturday night and you’re lying in bed, fingertips thickly coated in Dorito dust, engorged by your latest Netflix binge.

You’re 25. Your future wife isn’t going to find herself.

What are you waiting for? You’ll do it tonight. No, tomorrow. You’ll do it next week. You’re always too tired from work, so you tell yourself you’ll “get to it eventually.”

What are you waiting for? Speaking of your job, you’re taking about as many risks as Reuben Feffer. Complacency has become your most notable quality. Remember that Wayne Gretzky poster in your 7th grade math classroom? The one that says, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take”? Come on. Mrs. Kee didn’t hang that on her door for nothin’.

What the hell are you waiting for? As fate would have it, Jay Z’s status has not yet appeared. Nor has Beyoncé, but a kid can dream, can’t he? Well, let me be the first to remind you that you’re a grown-ass man. And Jay Z has more Grammys than dollars in your wallet.

What are you waiting for? I’ve had my foot on the imaginary brake over here for about three seconds now. Are you trying to rear end the guy stopped in front of you? Seems that way. Anyways, as your backseat driver, I like to imagine that one day it will magically work and Yoda will pop out of the trunk to welcome me to the Jedi Order.

What are you waiting for? The sign says “Do Not Enter.” The invitation could not be clearer. Please proceed.

For what are you waiting? It dawns on you — only after your use of repetition as a rhetorical device — that this may actually be the grammatically correct usage. Upon further investigation, the forums say it’s acceptable to end with a preposition on this occasion.

Never trust the forums.

What are you waiting for? You’re an aspiring actor in New York City but you’re bouncing from table to table at Barn Joo. You have a degree from Brown in comparative literature. Well… you’re right. That might not help much, but still.

Literally… what are you waiting for? You did nothing all day, but for some reason find yourself rushing out the door to your dinner date. You’re 20 minutes late, it’s 90 degrees out, and now you’re sweating. Your self-consciousness just makes you leak more.

Figuratively, you’re waiting for your next “Alison.” It’s been over two years and you still think about her everyday. You just want to find someone you like more than yourself, which is difficult because you think you’re as awesome as those chicken dinosaurs you ate as a kid. And still eat today, if we’re being honest with ourselves.

What are you really waiting for? You’re in love with your friend, but you’ve been afraid to tell her because you don’t think you’re ready. You keep putting it off, telling yourself that the perfect moment will present itself like the Kool-Aid man in those old commercials.

But the perfect moment never comes. There’s no future golden age — just ebbs and flows. You’re drifting with the current. So are your friends, it seems, so you wait to see where the wave patterns will take you.

What are you waiting for? A promotion? A callback? A cue? A sign? For God’s sake. The truth is, you aren’t waiting for anything.

So what’s your next move?




Unlocking creativity through community. Dedicated to supporting and fostering the creative writing community. This is a place for compulsive creators, their work, and their stories. Prompts twice a month and stories published every day(ish). Brought to you by Likewise.

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Brett Stevens

Brett Stevens

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