My short time on medium could have saved my life!
Fortune favours the brave.
Today or tomorrow I will reach a hundred followers on medium and my lifetime earnings are $0.07 so no retirement but hope. I feel part of something and I’m inspired.
Such a lot has happened since my first article twelve days ago. Being a writer was a career choice at seven, my reading and writing was poor, my desire strong. Storytelling was a gift my entire family had, my younger brother at three would jump in and say ‘I tell ya’ whenever we’re feeding something back.
Over the last few weeks I have been coming to terms with nearly dying, retiring from touring and equally as big, Lisa, my wife, who I’ve been joined at hip with for twelve years, started a new career. I was uncertain about my future, healthwise, financially and emotionally. No idea what the new normal would look like, I now had space to access my life, refind a joy that had eroded over time.
Looking at my life I couldn’t see what was missing, but I was numb to the joy and love around me. I was burnt out, eight years touring as a psychic medium, had opened me up to tens of thousands of peoples pain. I, along with the other mediums; which include my wife, offered comfort via spirit messages, evidence of the continuity of spirit, advice and support.
We allowed the spirit to work through us, while we were soaking up the pain created by people having experienced the worst life can offer, then sharing their stories with us, hoping we could stop them feeling so lost, spirit always offered support. I learned how unsafe the world could be and my joy felt out of place.
So now I had time to sit in helplessness and search for the lost joy.
Spirit tricked me into believing my writing was moving away from my spirit work.
I planned my first article, about a magical snow-circle that was created the night of a spiritual dance I did, picture and all. Instead I started writing and the dark night of the soul appeared. I shared it on facebook and got some nice feedback. One person who had been there when I went through the dark night of the soul reconnected. Also, another person who I feel I will work with in the future, sent me a message, creating a number of lights in my darkness. This meant so much.
Later that day, we went to a party, we talked to everyone and Lisa told them about her new job, everyone was really happy for her. Then they asked what I was doing? I knew from the messages I had received from them, not dying would be enough, but I could do better than that, I had published my first article on medium. Do you get paid for it? Lisa answered no, I was livid, it was true but not a reality I was prepared to live in, I smiled and stated my intent to succeed.
The article had given me hope for the future, another pipe dream to push me through the pain and give me some purpose. Then a strange thing happened. I started reading other people’s articles and found myself really moved. I was investing again in people, the darkness was clearing. I really love it, the writing and the chats with amazing people.
I realized this is my dream, I had a few attempts in the past, I wrote ‘The Creator Within’ book, on another occasion I spent a few months, when I was a thinker, talking about being a writer. Now I write, it’s important, while failure is possible, I can control my effort and detach from the outcome. This is a huge success, being true to myself and going for what I want, instead of playing down the importance of what it means to me. I’m feeling again and enjoying the journey.
If you want to support my journey, buy me a coffee, thank you for reading.
