To the Lonely During This Time of Chaos

Whoever is reading this, I hope you are doing okay out there. I hope you are staying strong and I hope you realize that you are loved.

I admit that I haven’t been doing okay lately. I’ve drank more than I should, I’ve gone to some pretty dark places trying to deal with all of this insanity, and I’ve had a hard time wrapping my head around the true reality of what is happening right now.

I am a person who has been more than willing to do my part throughout this pandemic. I have never denied that this pandemic exists. I’ve been willing to wear my mask, go even more over-the-top than I usually do with hygiene, and do my part all around. Obviously I hate it, like everyone else, but I would much rather make life easier for the 75 year old in the grocery store who is terrified about what’s going on right now and put their mind at ease, than worry about how I’m being inconvenienced. I’ve had no problem grasping the fact that this is not all about me. Wearing a mask is not ‘oppressive’. Ask a person of colour, a member of the LGBTQ community, an immigrant who has lived through a war — what oppression feels like. Please don’t confuse being inconvenienced with being oppressed. Anyhow, I digress…I’ve done my part and put limited faith in the powers that be to properly handle this. I’ve always been skeptical, but I wasn’t going to allow my fear to potentially lead me to behave in a way that could put others at risk. That’s not my place.

Having said all of this, there comes a point when you have to realize that things are not what they seem. There has been absolutely zero transparency, nothing but orders to stay home, and a vaccine roll-out…with COVID numbers that don’t even make sense. I’ve been heading to a really bad emotional place, especially in the past six months or so, watching everyone turn their brains off and submit to this absolute insanity. I understand that we ALL want our lives to go back to ‘normal’. I think it’s time to understand at this point, though…that ship has sailed.

I want to ask people to really think about something for a minute here. I don’t care what your thoughts or opinions are on the vaccine and whether or not you want it. I don’t care what ‘information’ you’re getting from the media, or who either end of the political spectrum is telling you to believe, follow, or blame. Think long and hard though about what it means to be forced into a situation where you can’t travel, go to a concert, shop, go out for a beer with your friends…basically live your life — without having proof that you’ve handed your body over to the government to be injected with what is still an experimental vaccine.

Really think about this for a minute. There are a lot of nuances to this topic, and I have a lot more to get to, so I’m just going to leave this portion as is and simply ask you to really understand what this means. This vaccine is not proven to keep you from getting COVID. It is not proven to prevent the spread of COVID. The science on it isn’t complete. Some people have had serious complications after getting vaccinated. You can get mad at me for saying this if you want to, but it doesn’t make what I’m saying any less true.

You don’t have to agree with me, I’m simply asking you to think.

COVID has a death rate of about 2.2% (generously speaking) worldwide, and a vast majority of people who get COVID recover with no major problems or difficulties. How is it that over 97% of us, worldwide, are being confined to our homes because of this? Now that the dust has settled over the past year and we see what this all looks like…really think about it. Small businesses, who in my experience have done the best job at enforcing proper COVID prevention measures are being shut down, and in many cases, forced to close simply because they can’t afford to keep going. Why are the large corporate businesses who have the most lax COVID prevention measures I’ve ever seen still open? Large corporations are reaping absolutely insane benefits from all of this, while small businesses are suffering immensely, with very few special exceptions. There is honestly a part of me that wonders if this is intentional at times. Sure, some small business are managing to adapt and keep their doors open, but this certainly doesn’t apply to everyone…and how long will they actually be able to do this for?

The truth is that the real victims of the COVID pandemic most often aren’t even those who are falling ill with the virus. They’re the people who have taken their lives due to mental health issues, substance abuse to try and cope, people who have lost everything, people who feel hopeless. They can’t imagine living in a future where they’ve handed their body over to the governments of the world and fallen into line, simply so that they can live a ‘normal’ life. They know that there are people within their own circle of friends or even families who, out of pure fear and compliance, will turn on them if they refuse to fall in line with this tyranny.

In my own experience about two weeks ago, I had a horrible case of food poisoning. When I say bad, I mean as bad as you think. It was absolutely terrible! I was dangerously dehydrated. I couldn’t be away from the bathroom for more than a couple of minutes at a time, so going to emerg was not going to be happening. I called a Dr’s office for some help. The doctor wasn’t in, and I was told, ‘this isn’t a directive, but you’ll probably be told to go for a COVID test.’ My response was that I knew I had food poisoning, it was textbook symptoms of severe food poisoning, and I had the same thing repeated to me. I tried to call another doctor’s office and had no success getting through to anyone. Thankfully, I know some good people who work in the holistic field who were kind enough to check in on me and make sure I was okay.

This was honestly my big a-ha moment about this whole thing. I completely woke up.

How many people have really died of COVID? How many people have died because they weren’t properly assessed, diagnosed, treated, and had their deaths attributed to COVID. Seriously…severe food poisoning, told I’d probably have to get a COVID test? Imagine someone who was in a much more life threatening state who ran into a similar situation.

I’m aware that the things I’m saying right now are going to make a lot of people very uncomfortable, skeptical, whatever…if that’s the case it’s actually a good thing from my perspective because if you’re uncomfortable, then on some level you know something is wrong. Whether you want to or not. At this point, you might think I agree with you, or you might think I disagree with you. Chances are, you’re wrong either way. I walked up to the Kool-Aid, dipped my cup in it, put it back down on the table in front of me, and walked away from it completely. That means politics, news, social media (for the most part). Going against the grain doesn’t make you a critical thinker. Fear-based thinking doesn’t make you a critical thinker. The people who are actually the critical thinkers right now aren’t the people who are screaming from either side of the political spectrum. Believe me, I was one of these people. They’re not the people who are tuned into ANY news outlet 24/7, looking for answers. They’re not the people who have chosen to submit and take part in this tyranny. I’ve actually come to realize that these people are the reason that all of this has been able to happen. We have been divided, conquered, locked down, and pretty soon — forced to be vaccinated. So please remember this; while you’re screaming from one end of the political spectrum at the other end, relying on god to save you (religion is just another tool being used to keep us divided — please wake up), refusing to realize that you have been duped, by either side of the exact same system…you are making it possible for all of this to happen. Please read again: If you’ve allowed yourself to scream from either side of the divide, allowed ‘politicians’ to get you on board with their agendas because they’ve managed to successfully politicize this, you have made it possible for this to happen.

I have fought with friends. I have fought with family members. I have fought with myself. Then, when I finally realized that I was on my own path to becoming one of those victims of COVID who didn’t die from the disease, but instead from complete hopelessness — and was still likely to become a COVID statistic — I realized I have to say something. I will never regret saying what I’m thinking right now, but I know that If I don’t say it, I will absolutely have regrets.

I want to tell the people who are feeling this way that you’re not alone. Even though it feels like the lonliest place in the world sometimes, you are not alone. It’s okay to know that something’s wrong, no matter how many terrified people spit venom at you for it. It’s okay to realize that neither side of our bs political spectrum cares about us or is going to help us. It’s okay to see things for what they are.

It’s okay.

Let yourself breathe. Try to have patience with people who are starting to wake up…even though we need them right now. Realize that when you feel like even the smartest people around you have chosen to tune out, you don’t have to. Keep resisting. Even if there is just a small fibre of your being that tells you this is wrong, it’s telling you that for a reason. Keep resisting.

…and take it from someone who almost gave up…because I did almost give up: You are not alone. We have a very hard road ahead of us, but its okay. As long as we stand together and stay strong, it’s going to be okay.

Don’t give up!❤❤❤