You Know You’re Old When You Have to Schedule Time to Get Ready for Bed
Published in
Sep 4, 2024
I admit I fall asleep on the sofa watching TV. I’ve recently advanced to falling asleep sitting up in a chair. I’ve turned into my father, who missed the conclusion of any show that started after 9 p.m.
Should I get up and roll into bed? Or should I be a good girl and do my nightly ablutions?
Brush teeth.
Floss.
Gargle for 30 seconds to stave off gum disease.
Apply gel eye drops, mostly on cheeks.
Massage in retinol cream for the crepe skin that has now appeared on the back of my hands, thanks to hours of outdoor pickleball.
In winter, rub in cream for dry heels and brush on cuticle softener.
By the time I’m done, I’m wide awake. Thank goodness for a good book.
