Aug. 26, 2016 — Mailbag Edition

Eds. Note: On occasional Fridays, the Editors will respond to letters from our readers. We welcome your honest or dishonest feedback and questions at any point — please submit Letters to the Editor by emailing editors@thedailymarkieff.com.

Mailbag Edition

Dear Editors:

My interest in the riviting [sic] episode of Aug. 22 was shaken by the introduction of a clearly fictional character. Graves Spindler? That name is obviously a fabrication, and makes me question the authenticity of this otherwise plausible story.

-Disappointed in DC

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Dear Disappointed:

We too thought twice about the introduction of Mr. Spindler’s character, but decided The Daily Markieff could use a bit of fantasy. Most editions are so dry — our intention was to “spice it up a bit” with a few kooky names.

-The Editors

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Dear Editors:

As they have said in Spain 
It only rains on the plain
Though when in a plane
Perhaps inside a hurricane

Trump is truly so insane
Clinton should be ashamed
Get me on a new train
Markieff can change the game!

-Poet in Minnesota

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Dear Poet:

I am inspired by your lyrical skills. Would you be interested in an internship?

-The Editors

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Dear Editors:

I’m wondering what the rise of Markieff might mean for the chances of Antonin Scalia returning to fill his vacant seat on the Supreme Court. Do I dare to dream?

-Hopeful in Texas

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Dear Hopeful:

How can you expect me to see the future? Also, they outlawed dreaming in Texas so you’d better stick with reality and look forward to the upcoming return of Justice Rehnquist to the bench. He was spotted drinking margs in Milwaukee last Thursday.

-The Editors

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Dear Editors:

This is Mook. Where is Mark’ ‘Keif?

-Mook

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Dear Mook:

Thank you for submitting this fine question. I have never heard of Mark, is he anoth….GODDAMMIT MOOK STOP SENDING PRANK LETTERS! You get us ever time!

-The Editors

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Dear Editors:

Regarding the Aug. 10 edition of the Markieff, may I say #morekiefflesscaine.

-Friend of the Zombies

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Dear Friend:

You are free to say what you like. Also, who is Caine?

-The Editors

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Shouts-Out

Shout out to Andrew Dixon for the subscriber referral this week! Information on the Refer-a-Friend program can be found below.

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To submit a letter to the Editors, email editors@thedailymarkieff.com with “Letter” in the subject line. No submissions longer than 150 words will be accepted. Publication of and responses to submitted letters is at the sole discretion of the Editors. Letters selected for publication will most often run in a future “Mailbag Edition” of The Daily Markieff.