December 12, 2016–18:15 (or Identity)

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; Before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.” — Jeremiah 1:5

Do you know how things stand out in your spirit as you read them? When I read that for the first time (many years ago) that was what happened to me. It was also the first time I heard God call me by name. Anyway, that’s something that I’ve been trying to figure out all my life—who I am; where I belong… There’s nothing—or at least very little—in this life that I feel connected to, or identify with.

I’m black; but I’ve never felt connected to black society or culture to a major degree. I’m a man, but I’ve never been the stereotype. I’m not a huge sports fan and asking me if I saw “the game” isn’t a great conversation starter. I’m “Christian.” However, I find myself at odds with the organized institutions of belief. I’m a “gamer”, “nerd”, and “geek”, but there’s no community that I feel I completely fit in with. [I’ve accepted publicly that] I’m bisexual. Even though I do feel the weight of societal attitudes and biases toward all things LGBT, I don’t feel the need to wear it like a banner that needs to be flown in everyone's face.

I’m many more things that I don’t feel like taking the time to name. Though no matter what things I may be, the only thing that I want people to think when they see me is “Man of God.”

“…If I am a man of God, let fire come down from heaven and consume you and your fifty men.” — 2 Kings 1:10, 12