Another Chapter, Ending.
And I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. –Neil Gaiman
Today is basically the last day of this year. As I wrote this, the clock just stroke 11.07 AM on a Friday and my colleagues were busy finishing up their end-of-year achievement targets.
Many certainly got plans for the evening; be it with their families grilling some juicy meats or out and about going wild at some party with some strangers who would probably end up at the groups‘ table.
But hey, tell me that it’s not just me who has this feeling of abrasive confusion towards the whole year. To put it out lightly: What a hell of a ride it has been.
Both major and minor events had laid themselves bare before me. Forcing me to dissect any and every connections or emotions tied to it.
Notoriously speaking, this year is full of weariness, uncomfortable thoughts, and overwhelming sensations.
It actually felt as if God would not let me catch a break through it out but at the same time, gave me all the wondrous.
It was as if 2021 was nothing if only a mere week yet, also felt like an action-packed three years time shoved into one. Threatening to implode.
2021 felt like the year where the world was afraid to be caught dead in their tracks, so it dashed off like the road runner yet, rested for too long in between.
2021 was full of question marks and bewildered states but, it’s the year where I feel like I was actually growing.
For me, it’s a year of self-acceptance.
The year where I finally let myself loose from time-to-time; that it is genuinely okay to stop everything for five minutes, hit that play button to my favorite tunes and dance it all out by my damn self.
The year I am genuinely learning and trying to be a better company for myself.
The year I discover myself to truly be able to be okay with being alone. To find joy in the midst of darkness, turmoil, and chaos — and just endure it.
To just sit down for a while and breathe.
Not unfamiliar however — it’s like I went on a Déjà vu — I lose some individuals that I thought would be by my side for the whole year yet, acquired some new ones somewhere down the road that I would be forever grateful for having just to know them.
But, since everyone shaped me for who I am today so safe to say that I am utterly thankful for each and every single people I have met this year.
Sure, I do not wish to turn on this new 2022 chapter with some of them but hey, to the ones who I do wish to, see you next year! — Aha, (weak) pun intended.
All in all, I think I‘m ending the year with contentment, no residing grudges to anything or anyone as I have tried to make my peace. I have tried to make amends to the ones I wronged, both intentionally and un.
And lastly, to all of you who have filled my 2021, either with joy or sorrow or just plain there, thank you. You made me, me.
And I made memories, I shed some tears, I blossomed in things I did not think was possible, I achieved some of my goals, I went through some disappointments, I got let down from time to time and I enjoyed every bits of it all.
Well to end this year, congratulations me for passing yet another one and here’s to another year down the road.
2022, please be good.