The Disaster Book
Published in

The Disaster Book

The Best Party Ever

Is it bad that I really want him to be impressed?
I feel silly even writing it, but Jason is already very special to me.


Dear Diary,

Though the smell is probably going to give me away at this point, I think the payoff will be totally worth it — I’m giving Jason the best surprise party ever.

He isn’t going to be here for another hour but I’ve already scattered the broken glass at the base of the doorframe in anticipation — and though the virgin’s blood is getting sticky and gross on the back of my neck, I had just enough buckets to fill the entire bathtub and most of the altars. He probably won’t even notice, but I’ll get it 100% right next time.

Now I’m up on Jason’s roof just waiting, totally bored. I already fed the cage of rats into the air vent like I had practiced last week — it’s hard to tell if everything’s going to work when it’s all just on paper, but I’m pleasantly surprised at how smooth the whole process is going. Is it bad that I really want him to be impressed? I feel silly even writing it, but Jason is already very special to me.

Sure, I haven’t known him that long — we met in our Economics lecture a few weeks back when he needed the notes from the previous week — seeing an opportunity to get to know him better, I said I didn’t have the notes with me (I totally did!) so I could get his email address. Now, I know what you’re thinking — how do I know he’s single? Let’s just say I have a hunch. Maybe its was the way he carried himself, walking slowly from place to place — not the kind of thing you see when a guy has a steady girlfriend — you know what I mean? Girls tend to keep guys on a schedule, whether they mean to or not, and I’m just saying it shows — but anyway it was that and the causal cigarette smoking in the quad. Maybe I’m just ready for someone who can slow me down, ya know, since I’m so type A and always running around all the time.

Like at this party! I hope it’s not too much. But when I set my sights on something I just do it, 100%, and sometimes I forget how crazy I can seem.

Jason doesn’t think I’m crazy. I asked him. He was like, “No way, I think it’s a really good idea to color code your notes.” That meant a lot to me; growing up I always got made fun of for being neurotic like that. That reminds me!

Did you know that when you cremate someone all that’s left is the bones?

They grind those up, and THAT’S what they give you in an urn! Crazy huh?! It’s not ashes, it’s ground up bones. I learned that earlier and thought it was interesting.

Anyway, I hear Jason coming so I’m going to go. Who knows — the next time we talk, maybe I’ll have a WHOLE LOT of updates for you :D
Wish me luck Diary!

- Amanada



A Collection of very short fiction by Nick Anderson

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