The Benefits of a Seven Mile Walk

Had a massive bowl of ice cream last night after an unpleasant (but not significant) family discussion over dinner. The ice cream was just for me, it wasn’t something I was bringing back for everyone as a treat. After dropping my thirteen year old off someplace after dinner, I headed for Safeway and bought a pint of Chunky Monkey and a pint of Haagen Daaz chocolate peanut butter. I was quiet and discreet in the kitchen. Mixed them together into a massive bowl of sugar and cream and ate them alone while I watched the Madoff documentary on Netflix, which is very good, by the way. After lunch today I polished off the remainders of both pints. But I’d earned it, because I took a long walk this morning.

Long walks are one of my great pleasures. First of all, it’s relevant to know that when I’m sitting right across from another human being at a table and talking to them, it’s fine. But at it’s most compelling and when I’m most comfortable, I feel at most 85% at ease with them staring at me continuously and me staring back at them. I feel my face sometimes twists up with anxiety even if I happen to be talking to one of my favorite people about a topic that interests me. The factors at play are related to feng shui, psychology and the human instinct for safety. It’s not something I’m particularly curious about or am compelled to solve at this late date. But take that same person, with the same content, and cast the engagement over a long walk and I’m as comfortable as can be. The factors at play involve beautiful brain chemistry. Something about the body in motion, dopamine, endorphins, yada yada.

So I take long walks with a variety of friends on a regular basis. But most times I’m walking alone, and the longer distance the better, especially if I’ve gourged myself like I did last night.

Here is why I love it. First off, I can accomplish two things at once: exercise and meditation. Half of my time since discovering meditation about six years ago I don’t meditate at all. I spend significant times in the blah state of letting it all hang out, which sucks. But at times like the present day, I’m on it and keep a spreadsheet tracking how much (or if) I meditate each day, how I do it, and also if I exercise and what that entailed.

When I take a walk alone, I turn my notifications off and set my timer for twenty minutes. I try to rest my mind and pay attention to it. It spins off, of course, and I do my best to bring it back to what I’m looking at. The trees, birds, cars in motion, my feet moving forward. Then it spins off again and I bring it back. I’ll notice what I’m feeling… often it is a low level anxiety, and I’ll do my best to look at it, to recognize that it’s not me that’s anxious, it’s me recognizing that anxiety is present. Or anger, or sadness, or joy, or whatever the hell my brain, body and soul are serving up.

I’m amazed at how my mind and emotions resist being controlled or even monitored in any way, like a pit of snakes writhing around. But if I keep at it, I can develop a small space between me and whatever thoughts or feelings I’m experiencing. That’s the goal. To not be reactive, to not be a slave to my thoughts and emotions. Sometimes that twenty minute walking meditation feels like a wrestling match, and I’m already speculating that I’ll get exactly zero benefit from it, once the timer mercifully sets me free.

Then when my times up… I feel different. Just a little bit. But noticeably more grounded and present. And I can check it off my spreadsheet when I get home, which has it’s own psychological benefit.

I also like taking long walks because it’s easy. I’m a good walker. I’m a fantastic walker, in fact. I walked twelve miles one day. But usually it’s six or seven miles over two or two and a half hours, first thing in the morning. I have arthritis in my left knee and I miss running a great deal. But I don’t even get sore after taking super long walks, which makes me think the knee isn’t too bad after all. But the key here is that I’m a lazy human who doesn’t like pain. Any other type of exercise involves pain. Walking is just pure pleasure. Not that you get the same cardio benefits from a long walk, but if you google it, there are major benefits overall. Ofentimes, the choices for me relating to exercise are DO NOTHING or TAKE A LONG WALK. Choosing the latter is way, way better than doing nothing, obviously. And I can list it in my spreadsheet and tell myself I’m on track… which I am.

The final thing I have to say about long walks is that I have the time to take them. That’s a blessing. Ever since I earned a ticket out of corporate america through crypto, I’ve been intent on not wasting the opportunity. My American-oriented-type-A-achievement matrixed brain is constantly beating myself up because I don’t think I’m doing enough. I haven’t written a second book. I haven’t started a non-profit or done something extraordinary. But wasn’t the goal of taking the big risk in the first place to get to a point where I don’t have to prove myself worthy all the time? Who will really care twenty years after I die (or even now) if I’ve written more than one book, or found some acclaim in the second half of my life? And, ironically, the more I let myself off the hook and take pleasure in small things, the more I naturally want to write pieces like this, that are small and honest and not conceived in some outsized ambition.

I certainly don’t want to waste my days away, worrying about the story of my life while I should be enjoying life’s simple pleasures. And for me, walking is one of them.