A 4 Min Diary: Please don’t say just Hi, Hello, and How are you
Let’s Break the Cycle of Empty Hellos
After a long and tiring day, I find a moment of solitude as I unlock my phone to check on my world, the digital realm that connects me with friends, family, and acquaintances.
One app I use a lot is LinkedIn. Almost every time I open it, I see a barrage of messages from strangers greeting me, many holding the promise of conversation, connection, and perhaps even compassion. Yet, as I filter through them, I find myself disappointed— the bulk of these messages are simple one-line greetings devoid of substance or context. These greetings have become like the traffic jams of our digital roads, slowing down the pace and blocking the real talks we should be having.
Why It’s a Problem
I ponder on this commonplace occurrence — the ritual of initiating a conversation with a “Hi,” “Hello,” or a “How are you.” Imagine having ten of them in your inbox. Who to reply to? What is the genuine utility behind these one-liners that neither convey information nor strike a chord emotionally? When will you get the reply back? How much time can you commit to these conversations?
Hi
Hello
Hi, how are you?
Hola
Hi
Hii
Helo
Hi, how can I help you?
Hi there
Hie
Imagine the toll of replying to ten “hi” messages. Not only is it tedious, but it hardly guarantees a meaningful response in return. It traps us in a cycle of superficial exchanges, stalling potentially enriching conversations before they even begin. Unfortunately, most follow-up messages lack clarity and context, leading to a chat that feels more like an obstacle course than a smooth road to genuine interaction.
Generally, it's one of these things:
- Referral for some job openings (refer to this blog post to better understand how to seek a referral).
- Some life or career advice.
- And the worst of all — another boilerplate formality question, asking if they can ask something. Just why! No, please don’t.
And almost every reply still does not have the complete context and purpose.
The only way to properly handle these things is to replace myself with some AI chatbot that can do all these conversations on demand at once. Most of these days, I say Bye to the hi — no headspace or time for such things.
But if you want something from me (or any other person on social media who has some following), the most efficient way is to drop these boilerplate greetings and directly come to the point — tell what you want in one short message, with complete context, and you’ll get your answer in one reply. That’s it. Simple.
I can’t guarantee that you will get a reply 100%**, but this will definitely maximize your chances. Trust me, everyone on this side of the table will appreciate it a LOT!
(**Of course, I need to take time for myself and my everyday life, and I have only 24 hours. Sometimes, I may forget to reply or get preoccupied with some other stuff)
How to Communicate More Effectively
It’s not just about saving time; it’s about fostering a space where each message carries substance and where we respect each other’s mental space and time.
Why do we keep circling around the real talk? It’s a bit like going round and round in circles instead of going straight to the destination.
I get it. It is our way, a warm way to start a conversation, I totally understand. But think from the receiving side. Time is less, and in this one life, why waste even a second in empty formalities? It doesn’t set you apart. It doesn’t make me feel eager to reply immediately.
My limited time compels me into a reluctant yet necessary stance — to ignore messages that don’t cut to the chase. It is not out of arrogance but a plea for clarity and brevity in a world swirling with information and demands on our attention. It beckons a shift in perspective — to be more considerate and to value not just our time but the recipient’s as well.
Most people don’t really care about all these niceties. In fact, it makes the conversations slower, harder, clumsy, and difficult to track. Your chat is lost in the crowd before you even send your second message.
So, how do we break free from this cycle?
It starts with self-awareness and a conscious effort to communicate with intent. We need to cast aside the redundant formalities and be bold, striking directly at the heart of the matter from the onset. Whether asking a question or sharing an insight, let’s do it freely and without hesitation, offering complete context in a concise manner.
Towards Thoughtful Digital Exchanges
As we move forward in this digitally connected era, let’s evolve our understanding of politeness to suit our fast-paced lives.
I invite you to actively engage in a self-reflective journey to improve your digital communication habits. When crafting your next message, pause and think — does it foster a meaningful exchange? Does it resonate with genuine intent? Does it have the complete context?
Next time I receive a lone “Hi” message from a stranger, I intend to reply with a link to this diary entry to share my thoughts in full. Write once, and use it forever. :P
If you are a creator facing a similar problem, feel free to use this article link as needed.
More links to explore.
- https://nohello.info/
- https://nohello.net/en/
- https://nohello.club/
- https://nohello.org/
- https://sbmueller.github.io/nohello/
You get the point? A lot of people would appreciate it.
