How To Discover Your Summer Aesthetic

Welcome to Make Your Face, a makeup tutorial series with a simple mission: makeup by you (me) for your (my) own entertainment, Establishment-style.

So, I was feeling like:

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Totally uninspired. So I asked some people for Make Your Face suggestions, and my friend Danielle was like: “Pink.” And I was like, “lol no, ew pink?! Gross no, thanks tho man 💖” and wandered off to think of something else.

I still hadn’t thought of anything else but was about to show you my summer foundation routine (one pump of foundation to one of moisturizer, put uncut foundation on center of forehead/under eyes/on the front of cheeks and chin, mix the rest with moisturizer and put it on everything else) anyway, when suddenly I realized:

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Everything was FILTHY!

I mean, I knew my makeup station was overdue for dusting, I was aware of the fact, but I had somehow successfully managed to put it from the forefront of my mind and carry on with my life and then suddenly I just couldn’t. I, like, experienced the feeling of dirtiness viscerally and had to drop everything and clean it.

My mom warned that this pathological cleanliness thing would happen to me. She told me that I would become her, one day. I didn’t want to believe it, but denial didn’t save me.

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It took forever. Finally it was done.

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And then! Then I discovered something wonderful!!

Expository aside: My sister-in-law gave me a set of mini Kat Von D lipsticks for Christmas. Working my way through them bit by bit, I discovered my favorite pink lip product of all time — KVD Studded Kiss Lipstick in “iridescent fluorescent pink” shade “Sexer” — in February on a particularly magical trip to Miami to visit friends. I wore it for the plane ride home, caught a glimpse of my reflection in a flash of spectacular sunset selfie light and thought, verbatim: “This will be my new signature lipstick when I get home! I am going to wear just one lipstick all the time now, and this lipstick is the ONE!” Then I got home and my smallest and most demanding dog snatched The One Lipstick out of my purse and chewed it up when I failed to initiate a game of fuzzy blanket wrestlemania quickly enough for her taste.

I have mourned “Sexer” ever since, wanting to wear it again but unwilling to drop $21 for a full-size tube. And then! Cleaning, I found an empty Kat Von D lipstick sampler box and went to throw it away (this is not uncommon; it usually takes me about a month to throw away a pretty box after removing the product). But the box felt a bit heavy to be completely empty. I looked inside, and, and somehow. . .

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!!!!!!

Who am I to deny the power of pink? And what was I even fronting about when Danielle mentioned it?

I have worn this makeup every day for a week:

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I am currently obsessed with this fluorescent neon pink paint, and chunky pink/green iridescent glitter:

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Who am I to deny destiny and hypocritically disavow my love of iridescent fluorescent pink? I knew, when the second “Sexer” mysteriously appeared, that I had to follow the look to its logical conclusion.

First, eyebrows and a flawless pencil-up-the-nose illusion selfie.

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Pink:

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Shiny light pink:

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Fluffy brush-applied bright pink!

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The key to eyeliner, I’ve been thinking, is near-inhuman patience, and also steely-eyed indifference to the sensation of sharp poky things tickling the base of your eyelashes.

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Mascara!

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Lashes: tweezers make it easier.

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Again with the poky things! Purple this time.

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Pink, pink piiiink, purple pink!

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Put on glasses and actually SEE the pink!

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Never forget your neck.

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Enough?

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HELL NO.

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And of course, everything can always be a little shinier.

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This is what my current hairstyle would look like if it were suddenly long, perfectly silky and devoid of frizz, and also a wig.

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Purple and pink. Covered in glitter. Girly as fuck.

Summer aesthetic:

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Or…let’s be real here.

Summer aesthetic:

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