Emotional Intelligence

Emotional Management

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and manage your own emotions and the emotions of others. It is generally said to include three skills:

1. Emotional awareness, including the ability to identify your own emotions and those of others;

2. The ability to harness emotions and apply them to tasks like thinking and problems solving;

3. The ability to manage emotions, including the ability to regulate your own emotions, and the ability to cheer up or calm down another person.

Recognize, understand and manage our own emotions

Recognize, understand and influence the emotions of others

In practical terms, this means being aware that emotions can drive our behavior and impact people (positively and negatively), and learning how to manage those emotions – both our own and others – especially when we are under pressure.

Emotional intelligence

Ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups

Emotional intelligence (EI) is the capability of individuals to recognize their own, and other people’s emotions, to discern between different feelings and label them appropriately, to use emotional information to guide thinking and behavior, and to manage and/or adjust emotions to adapt environments or achieve one’s goal(s).

Although the term first appeared in a 1964 paper by Michael Beldoch, it gained popularity in the 1995 book by that title, written by the author, psychologist, and science journalist Daniel Goleman. Since this time, Goleman’s 1995 analysis of EI has been criticized within the scientific community, despite prolific reports of its usefulness in the popular press.

There are currently several models of EI. Goleman’s original model may now be considered a mixed model that combines what have subsequently been modeled separately as ability EI and trait EI. Goleman defined EI as the array of skills and characteristics that drive leadership performance. The trait model was developed by Konstantin Vasily Petrides in 2001. It “encompasses behavioral dispositions and self perceived abilities and is measured through self report”. The ability model, developed by Peter Salovey and John Mayer in 2004, focuses on the individual’s ability to process emotional information and use it to navigate the social environment.

Studies have shown that people with high EI have greater mental health, job performance, and leadership skills although no causal relationships have been shown and such findings are likely to be attributable to general intelligence and specific personality traits rather than emotional intelligence as a construct. For example, Goleman indicated that EI accounted for 67% of the abilities deemed necessary for superior performance in leaders, and mattered twice as much as technical expertise or IQ. Other research finds that the effect of EI on leadership and managerial performance is non-significant when ability and personality are controlled for, and that general intelligence correlates very closely with leadership. Markers of EI and methods of developing it have become more widely coveted in the past decade. In addition, studies have begun to provide evidence to help characterize the neural mechanisms of emotional intelligence.

Criticisms have centered on whether EI is a real intelligence and whether it has incremental validity over IQ and the Big Five personality traits. Review finds that, in most studies, poor research methodology has exaggerated the significance of EI.

Stress Management

Stress management refers to the wide spectrum of techniques and psychotherapies aimed at controlling a person’s levels of stress, especially chronic stress, usually for the purpose of improving everyday functioning.

In this context, the term ‘stress’ refers only to a stress with significant negative consequences, or distress in the terminology advocated by Hans Selye, rather than what he calls eustress, a stress whose consequences are helpful or otherwise positive.

Stress produces numerous physical and mental symptoms which vary according to each individual’s situational factors. These can include physical health decline as well as depression. The process of stress management is named as one of the keys to a happy and successful life in modern society. Although life provides numerous demands that can prove difficult to handle, stress management provides a number of ways to manage anxiety and maintain overall well-being.

Despite stress often being thought of as a subjective experience, levels of stress are readily measurable, using various physiological tests, similar to those used in polygraphs.

Many practical stress management techniques are available, some for use by health professionals and others, for self-help, which may help an individual reduce their levels of stress, provide positive feelings of control over one’s life and promote general well-being.

Evaluating the effectiveness of various stress management techniques can be difficult, as limited research currently exists. Consequently, the amount and quality of evidence for the various techniques varies widely. Some are accepted as effective treatments for use in psychotherapy, while others with less evidence favouring them are considered alternative therapies. Many professional organizations exist to promote and provide training in conventional or alternative therapies.

There are several models of stress management, each with distinctive explanations of mechanisms for controlling stress. Much more research is necessary to provide a better understanding of which mechanisms actually operate and are effective in practice.

Employers should really consider learning and practicing emotional intelligence to help benefit both them, their employees and their business in the end result. How do you know nor have any real say in whether it makes enough sense to try if you don’t test it out for yourself to find out?

Exactly my point, how do you know something in particular that you feel will happen if you don’t try it out to see what will actually happen? So try it out, see what happens and if it doesn’t give you want you want, be more creative and optimistic until you get what you want.

Ask yourself, how badly do you want it? Imagine how you’d feel when you accomplish that thing, that goal or what that will look like? How that will help you progress along in your life to those important milestones and other goals that you wanna achieve! Then use that and anything else to be your motivation.

IQ or EQ: Which One Is More Important?

Traditional Intelligence vs. Emotional Intelligence

In his 1996 book Emotional Intelligence, author Daniel Goleman suggested that EQ (or emotional intelligence quotient) might actually be more important than IQ. Why? Some psychologists believe that standard measures of intelligence (i.e. IQ scores) are too narrow and do not encompass the full range of human intelligence. Instead, they suggest, the ability to understand and express emotions can play an equal if not even more important role in how people fare in life.

What’s the Difference Between IQ and EQ?

Let’s start by defining the two terms in order to understand what they mean and how they differ. IQ, or intelligence quotient, is a number derived from a standardized intelligence test. On the original IQ tests, scores were calculated by dividing the individual’s mental age by his or her chronological age and then multiplying that number by 100. So a child with a mental age of 15 and a chronological age of 10 would have an IQ of 150. Today, scores on most IQ tests are calculated by comparing the test taker’s score to the scores of other people in the same age group.

EQ, on the other hand, is a measure of a person’s level of emotional intelligence. This refers to a person’s ability to perceive, control, evaluate, and express emotions. Researchers such as John Mayer and Peter Salovey as well as writers like Daniel Goleman have helped shine a light on emotional intelligence, making it a hot topic in areas ranging from business management to education.

Healthy Mind

Learn the best ways to manage stress and negativity in your life.

Since the 1990s, emotional intelligence has made the journey from a semi-obscure concept found in academic journals to a popularly recognized term. Today, you can buy toys that claim to help boost a child’s emotional intelligence or enroll your kids in social and emotional learning (SEL) programs designed to teach emotional intelligence skills.

In some schools in the United States, social and emotional learning is even a curriculum requirement.

So Which One Is More Important?

At one point in time, IQ was viewed as the primary determinant of success. People with high IQs were assumed to be destined for a life of accomplishment and achievement and researchers debated whether intelligence was the product of genes or the environment (the old nature versus nurture debate). However, some critics began to realize that not only was high intelligence no guarantee for success in life, it was also perhaps too narrow a concept to fully encompass the wide range of human abilities and knowledge.

IQ is still recognized as an important element of success, particularly when it comes to academic achievement. People with high IQs typically to do well in school, often earn more money, and tend to be healthier in general. But today experts recognize it is not the only determinate of life success. Instead, it is part of a complex array of influences that includes emotional intelligence among other things.

The concept of emotional intelligence has had a strong impact in a number of areas, including the business world. Many companies now mandate emotional intelligence training and utilize EQ tests as part of the hiring process. Research has found that individuals with strong leadership potential also tend to be more emotionally intelligent, suggesting that a high EQ is an important quality for business leaders and managers to have.

So you might be wondering if emotional intelligence is so important, can it be taught or strengthened? According to one meta-analysis that looked at the results of social and emotional learning programs, the answer to that question is an unequivocal yes. The study found that approximately 50 percent of kids enrolled in SEL programs had better achievement scores and almost 40 percent showed improved grade-point-averages. These programs were also linked to lowered suspension rates, increased school attendance, and reduced disciplinary problems.

Observations

“…a national insurance company found that sales agents who were weak in emotional competencies such as self-confidence, initiative, and empathy sold policies with an average premium of $54,000. Not bad, right? Well, compared to agents who scored high in a majority of emotional competencies, they sold policies worth an average of $114,000.”

(Cooper, 2013)

“Research carried out by the Carnegie Institute of Technology shows that 85 percent of your financial success is due to skills in “human engineering,” your personality and ability to communicate, negotiate, and lead. Shockingly, only 15 percent is due to technical knowledge. Additionally, Nobel Prize winning Israeli-American psychologist, Daniel Kahneman, found that people would rather do business with a person they like and trust rather than someone they don’t, even if the likable person is offering a lower quality product or service at a higher price.”

(Jensen, 2012)

“IQ alone is not enough; EQ also matters. In fact, psychologists generally agree that among the ingredients for success, IQ counts for roughly 10% (at best 25%); the rest depends on everything else – including EQ.”

(Bressert, 2007)

Enjoy this article? You might also be interested in learning more about:

~ Multiple Intelligences

~ Theories of Intelligence

~ Learning Styles

Emotional intelligence is more powerful and so life-saving that anyone could ever imagine or believe it truly can be. How emotional intelligence can really impact one’s life.

To me, I never knew it existed until at some point I was letting myself experience life along with its natural path to learning everything I experience leading to learning how to better respond and think about situations.

Almost reaching my 2 year recovery mark, I’ve come to share with you all that it has so truly and gratefully impacted my life so much I’m so proud of myself for all I worked on and where it brought me: to a better, healthier, positive and empowered life.

You can live a normal and empowered life with mental illness.

Being emotionally intelligent can have its many benefits and can really admit to say myself can change the world yet overall psychology it’s we let it!

Overall, I believe that I have high intelligence and I honestly have to say that I absolutely love how I’ve been benefited from it!

Being intelligently wise can look like different views to different people. But when it comes to using it wisely, it’s a matter of knowing the right logic and choosing the right moments and reactions together to receive the right outcomes in return.

To me, I have to say that I have high emotional intelligence through the 2 years being in recovery from my mental health issues with depression, some anxiety and ADHD symptoms. Though I’d truly recommend both CBT and DBT therapy for those who want to better their intelligence and knowing more ways to cope with their issues, learn better things with mental health and much more!

Emotional intelligence is really important and really beneficial to all human beings. To me with having high emotional intelligence, it has truly impacted and changed my life greatly. I would truly recommend learning and practicing this subtopic in the mental health area and see where it changes you for the better and where it can take you in your life!

You’ll be amazed, but you’ll have to let it put you through whatever life puts you through, because that’s part of the lesson. Many things throughout the process, we don’t like but that’s good because regardless of not liking those things, they are actually good for us. They make us stronger and wiser in the end!

Feelings make you weak. – Damon, Vampire Diaries

Isolation is one of the many symptoms of depression and mental illness. Because we feel so alone with the effects of the stigma and discrimination, it’s so hard and almost even feels impossible, to do itself!

But there are many survivors out there who are surviving more on healthier levels as they progress in recovery. So if you have any role models or inspirational leaders you look up to, take some time to explore more about them and how they started on their way in recovery and how they succeeded and followed as they progressed as time passed.

Have you ever felt so much pain that you just want to not feel for a while. Other times you feel so numb that you wish you could just feel again because being paralyzed and numb is just taking a toll on us.

We all have felt quite like Demi Lovato’s lyrics to Skyscraper but we can rise above as we move along. But we have to move along in order to change and become mentally healthy as we go along.

And remember: people are allowed to inspire you but it’s your choice what you follow even if those people who inspire you set the examples of what they are inspiring.

If you want to do it your way with your own logic and inspiration? Then go for it! The logic and way that some people have followed in their lives are what they want others like their own family to follow themselves too.

But we don’t automatically have to just because they did and it may seem logical to them. It doesn’t mean we should believe it with the view they use. If you want to do it your own creative way, then do it. No one should nor have the right with any real logic to take it personally for when we choose our own instead of the inspiration we asked them.

We may feel like we are dying or that we may feel that we are having a heart attack or even a panic attack. In which it makes us believe easily enough that it’s the end of the world. And to panic more which makes it harder to fight against to do the right thing because it messes with our brain chemistry.

But meanwhile we are believing that it’s the end of the world at these times, the rest of the world is living their lives.

We easily follow the belief that we are gonna die or that it’s the end of the world but it’s really our brain that is making us believe that as well as us not knowing the real logic, knowledge and with proper education that there’s more to analyze about the situation than Wes re currently seeing ourselves!

“Parents don’t love you more because you’re biologically theirs. I mean, your moms – they don’t love you because your easy to deal with or because you keep your mouth shut. They love you because you’re you.” – Rita

We have to try and be who we want to be while in recovery. It’s gonna take lots of time. And it won’t be easy but it will be worth it.

We owe it to ourselves to be true to ourselves and not let society dictate our lives. That’s not in their control, because we shouldn’t let them be nor should they in the first place.

Inspired by the real-life Emergency Task Force of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, this taut police drama chronicles the efforts of the Strategic Response Unit (SRU), an elite and highly skilled group of cops charged with rescuing hostages, defusing bombs and breaking up gangs.

The series title comes from another part of their job, however: getting inside a suspect’s head and discovering his emotional “flashpoint” that triggered the crisis in the first place.

Leadership skills come when we know what we want and we find whatever we need in order to stand strong long enough to succeed and continue growing as we progress towards the things and milestones we want.

Here’s a great scenario to use, read it and really understand what David Nix, see where you can relate or understand where we are in our society and in our current generation and century:

Let’s imagine: if you glimpse the future, you were frightened by the future, what would you do with that information? You would go to politicians, captains of industry: how would you convince them with data, facts. Good luck. Any facts they won’t challenge, they keep the wheels greased and the dollars rolling in. But what if there was a way of skipping the middle man and putting the critical news right in everyone’s head.

The probability of widespread annihilation kept going up. The only way to stop was to show it. To scare people straight. What reasonable human being would be galvanize by the potential destruction of everything they’ve ever known or loved. To save civilization, I would show its collapse. But how do you think this vision was received? How do you think people responded to the prospect of imminent doom?

They gobbled it up in a chocolate eclair. They didn’t fear their demise, they repackaged it. It can be enjoyed as video games, tv shows, books, movies, the entire world, whole-heartedly embraced the apocalypse. But sprinted towards with gleeful abandon. Meanwhile your earth was crumbling all around you. Civil ten years epidemics of obesity and starvation, explain that one?

Bees and butterflies start to disappear, the glaciers melt, the algae glooms, all around you, the calamine canaries are dead and you won’t take the hint. In every moment there is a possibility of a better future, but you people won’t believe it. And because you won’t believe it, you won’t do what is necessary to make it a reality. So you dwell on this whole terrible future, you resign yourselves to it. One reason because that future doesn’t ask anything of you today. So yes you saw the iceberg, you were on the Titanic, but you all just steered for it full steam ahead. Why? Because you want to sink. You gave up. It’s not the monitor’s fault, that’s yours.

“When something bad happens, you have three choices: you can let it define you, you can let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.”

We find ourselves many times in our lives keeping our guard up by learning from past moments. Those moments when we have tried to open ourselves up to someone like a friend, family, partners, anyone which they respond in the wrong way.

They don’t take us seriously so we learned that we shouldn’t let our guard down to open ourselves up to others for the fear of getting hurt. Like this quote in New Years Eve, all of us can relate in our own ways!

And as you all can see, the ball has stopped half way to its perch. it’s suspended there to remind us before we pop the champagne and celebrate the new year, to stop, and reflect on the year that has gone by, to remember both our triumphs and our missteps, our promises made and broken, the times we opened ourselves up to great adventures… or closed ourselves down for fear of getting hurt, because that’s what new year’s all about , getting another chance, a chance to forgive. to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more, and to stop worrying about what if… and start embracing what will be. so when that ball drops at midnight, and it will drop, let’s remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other, and not just tonight but all year long.

This is a day to be chosen as a Self Care day! After what happened, interview never happened with Bench. Gonna try and reschedule it for another days.

After what happened as I mentioned in my previous post, I don’t think I’d be able to pull myself together to attend the interview if I stayed for another 30 minutes.

It was best for me and the situation to just reschedule and walk away. But honestly I don’t think Bench is a good place to work at after that happened. This is what feels right. I need to take care of myself. Watch more episodes of Grey’s Anatomy and then watch a movie on Netflix as well as possibly baking something sweet as a treat for what has happened today.

Just being so emotional and sensitive with my emotions lately, I deserve and need to take care of myself! And that’s what I’m gonna do. Screw what others think about my decision here.

I don’t care what they think, it’s not my problem anymore. I only care what I think of myself and what I think and belief or is best for me!

We all find ourselves telling others to be strong that we find we can’t do that ourselves!

When it comes to believing in ourself, we are the only one who can. It may be good to have others believe in us but believing in ourself is more powerful than you may think. Give it a try and see what happens!

The Power Of Freedom

Reaching that dangerous level of freedom when you don’t care what people think and more of what you think of yourself; so much positive change is possible!

You can then achieve anything you set your mind to because you stopped caring what people think which was what prevented you from achieving many things. Let alone, being overall happy as a human being!

Change happens when we let ourselves step out of our comfort zone and let ourselves feel uncomfortable as well as allowing anything we may not like, accept or agree with along the process. We must learn, accept and respect that the things we don’t like for example, are part of the process in which are the things we do not have any control in.

If you want change, you must accept, allow, and respect that change you want for someone else means you must contribute your own part in the process. It can’t be a one way street, both partners or friends must do their equal parts to make the relationship to work and do whatever they need to make it stronger. So then it can also make them stronger mentally and wiser logically!

If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you. – Fred Devito

“If you can change your mind, you can change your life!” ~ William James

No one can make us do what others think we can do because we look strong and capable on the outside. On the inside, we are most likely to be very fragile and sensitive to the media and many other things.

It’s important to hear our story and learn what you don’t see on the outside.

3 good things things that have happened recently:

1. Increasingly impact on my mood: which I’m so in love with!
2. So passionate, in love and fascinated with psychology and mental health advocacy!
3. Increased sense of wellbeing and success with my mental health recovery and treatment! More in control of habits and addictions with electronics and spending time wisely as well as being more productive with reading books I’m fascinated, & passionate about: the brain, psychology, mental health & mental illness!

Being in the teenage stage in our lives is so common to become so insecure about our bodies and pretty much everything that affects us.

And it can cause mental illness into the big picture. Yet there are many causes of mental illness and depression particularly being one of the most common illnesses out in the world.

But there’s always a way out, there’s still hope even to those who feel absolutely hopeless and even helpless. But in order to work their way out of the darkness and into the light, they must be the one to save themselves. From all the despair, darkness and all else that comes with mental illness.

We have to save ourselves in order for others to be able to do their part in that process. How will anyone know we are suffering if we don’t say so. And that will take enough courage and strength to speak out for help when in need to be saved.

So that first step towards recovery is speaking out to someone you feel comfortable with in getting help and then the process for your recovery will then begin.

I’ve screwed up. I forgot to call my grandpa to cancel. As for Emily was gonna drive me to my Bench interview and then Emily told me to call her to see if she can pick me up. As for her test is over at 2:00pm if I wanted to stay till then.

So I called and grandma got somewhat mad for me screwing up. I should’ve known to call to cancel but I wasn’t in the right mind nor on my mind.

As well as taking my meds. I haven’t yet taken my vitamin D, Concerta & birth control. I’m definitely gonna take them when I get home. But I’m gonna have to prepare myself for when mom finds out and she either calls me or yells/gets mad at me for at least 20+ minutes after work today.

This is so not my best day. I feel like crap, emotional, tears running down my face in the food court and need to prepare myself with enough confidence when I come back for 12:30.

I want others to know by this blog post that mental illness and mental health is so important that with how society has viewed and responded to so many choices and actions in which the rest of us make to stand up for ourselves and to add a message that it’s a part of reality now, (no one can try or force any different) and that we should learn, educate ourselves on how we can help those we know and love who live with mental illness so we can increase the number of lives we will save instead of the lives we will lose due to suicide. If we want to live in a better world, we must be the change we wish to see in the world!

So we need to speak up to those living with mental illness and want to help remove the stigma in their community to help strengthen our relationships and create long-lasting peace! To add, peace starts from within: in order to be kind to others, we must learn to be kind to ourselves first. We must work on loving ourselves unconditionally, and all that comes with mental health care and self love which reaches to the point of inner peace. At that point, we are then able to know how to treat others by how we have learned to treat ourselves. Treat yourself how you want others to treat you. Like the quote: you must love yourself first before anyone else. So you know what that kind of love looks like so you can express that same love but the romantic and family love to others you know and love.

Mindfulness is a technique I always start off teaching clients about this is because it is a practice that can benefit any mental health related issue. Minfulness is bout being in the moment. As humans we tend to think about the past or future we vary rarely enjoy the present and this tends to be the source of problems. This is where mindfulness comes in, training the mind to focus on the present moment. – Positive Mental Health