Meghan Markle Is A Badass & An Amazing Role Model

Stiff protocol, complex dress codes & a thousand years of royal rule: how much of her own identity will she have to give up to fit in?

Meghan Markle… one of the main characters of tv series, Suits to becoming part of the royal family; and becoming Duchess of Sussex. She is someone who not long after she got in the tabloids about her romance with Harry and then their engagement, I somehow found myself drawn to many qualities in her that I could really relate and connect with.

So many moments she’s had with the tabloids and also in the transformation and adjustments to the new changes to her life, have truly spoken well about her but to me; I’m on her side. No queen, manager, king, principal, boss could not should have nearly as much power and say about how the rest of the royals in the family should live their lives, what they can, cannot wear, how they can, cannot act and who they can, cannot be along with control over their own accounts & having rules about behaviour on social media and what they can and cannot post.

It’s beyond what anyone has control over; the only control we ourselves have control of is ourselves: what we say, what we do, what we wear, who we choose to be, how we choose to act and everything in between. Nothing there says that any one of us has the right to have power to control anything and anyone outside of that. I can relate to what she said here:

I’m pretending to be this beautiful swan gliding effortlessly on the surface and underneath I’m paddling like crazy just to stay afloat. Making compromise after compromise, trying not to make any waves. I’m even compromising on my passion project. The powers are that we are already saying that it’s too different and I’m letting them tell me how it should be. I feel sick. ~ Meghan

And I completely understand and truly relate with my own experiences of my own with my own issues and circumstances both at home, and at my job I worked at for 2 years and have left due to the circumstances of not being controlled like a robot. The government is all to blame for that!

When it comes to taking risks and sacrifices, it shouldn’t come to risking and sacrificing our own identity and all that makes us who we are and the things that we are both happy, proud and passionate about. If someone wants to enforce rules, they should think about making some changes to them and be open to hearing what other people have to say. They say that we are all allowed to have our many opinions but it’s not a bad thing to express them.

Because you never know what could make a real difference in the world if you just open the rules up to hearing everyone’s voices and beliefs! Who knows: you might find it linked to a past moment that was from one of your old wounds from any moment: trauma, sexual abuse/assault, emotional abuse/domestic abuse/violence, car crashes, fears, nightmares, perfectionism, etc!

Another important thing that the royal family have been enforcing very strictly is the dress code. The dress code is strict and tight, it’s so suffocating to so many individuals that the government, Royal family and other groups blind themselves from the real reality here. If they continue to cling and blind themselves from the reality that the rules aren’t working anymore; the more bad things will happen and the more they’ll get complaints and hate mail even.

Bad things happen if good people do nothing. ~ Jack Thornton, When Calls The Heart

With all that I’ve experienced from working at Walmart, It came to a certain point of the two years there where I could see it or not that I began losing sight of my real self and all that I’ve always valued and believed to be important to me as a person, human being and citizen of this society.

And I gotta say that is also one of the other reasons why I decided to leave with my two weeks notice as taking a break (short term) would be what’s truly best for me, my recovery and my mental and emotional wellbeing. One other thing is that I can so highly relate and connect my experiences with Walmart with Meghan Markle’s experience with what the highlighted part of the quote below expresses.

I can relate to it because I found myself following what Walmart wanted me to be and how to act and what they wanted me to do in order to be accepted and approved as a proud employee/associate of Walmart. Being that I sacrificed my values, and all that truly matters to me and all that makes me who I am and who I’m trying to become now, for something that made a mess of both myself and my life.

So when I was able to finally be more clear about this, I decided it was time to end it on good terms as I needed to get back what I’ve lost: and by that I also mean my power and control of what I choose to wear: freedom of expression through clothing and everything in between. It was time for me to regain the me that I’ve lost true sight of and get back the life I lost.

I’m finally taking back my power that I so easily gave to someone which I thought was what I needed but I became to obsessed about getting approval and I became someone who I didn’t recognize anymore. And I knew I had to change that!

But for the sake of this baby, I have to start living up to who I wanna be. This baby is gonna be part royal, and part me. I barely know who that is anymore. I’ve lost sight of it this summer and I have to set that right.

This next quote above is something I can relate and stand strong beside very strongly. It’s something I feel and have felt for many months while working part time hours at Walmart where I was expected to follow the strict rules of wearing ONLY: black and white attire and shoes.

I felt so hurt how they couldn’t try to make changes which to what I believe is healthy for our world to make from time to time to keep growing. I felt so mistreated not only by the managers from their lack of 100% mindful attention when being given the opportunity to vent and even share personal issues that have affected my work and productivity there; but also the customers as well. I felt hurt how customers:

• Don’t appreciate what I do for them: bagging their stuff and cashing them through the checkout as a cashier
• Lack of proper communication: even if Walmart is one place that’s known for bagging their costumers bags (especially without any communication from the customers) think they can “slack off” on communicating if they want their bags bagged or not: “yes I know you told me you brought your own bags but what is missing is their verbal communication whether they want me to do with their bags.”
• Most of the cashiers at Walmart are trained so they know what they are doing; unless there’s any easy tells that they are in training still; help them out; if not; let them be; they know what they are doing: unless they miss something that appears to you (customer) as a mistake, bring it to their attention. But keep in mind to be patient, we aren’t that fast as you’d like us to be.
• If you found an item and it was labeled as a specific price but when you found a scanner in the store and it was priced differently, ALWAYS ask an associate to confirm if the price on the scanner is correct or an error.
• If you see someone (a cashier or any other associate) looking down mentally/emotionally, cheer them up, be kind and gentle with them. You don’t know what happened that made them feel down: broke up with girlfriend/boyfriend, found out bad news of any kind (family member loss, friend loss or even suicide), and much else; it’s so important to be kind and not just give the name of them to the courtesy desk and/or even include in the survey where it gives you a chance to share your experience: cheer them up first: it can either change their day or not doing so will not make it any better. Be the first person to make someone’s day; not just paying for someone’s order but being kind and compassionate to the associates.
• Don’t complain every time something g goes wrong and you don’t get what you want: life isn’t always fair and you don’t always get what you want all the time: I got enough but also got lots that I didn’t get, you see me complaining? No: well I normally do it in private and eventually work on it to move on and learn from it and come through in a wiser side to it: which is part of my recovery. (Will explain further: below).

Those are just the ones that I can think of mainly. Some of it is just common sense. Be kind, be respectful, considerate and polite! Which also goes along with the golden role: treat others how you want others to treat you”.

More not cool to be cruel. It’s cool to be kind. ~ Meghan

Exactly said as I just mentioned about kindness, politeness, gentleness and etc. If you want kindness, be kind and it will reward you back; saying in different words. Kindness is cool and what isn’t is bullying, abuse, harassment, manipulation, control over other people, blackmail and other not acceptable behaviours.

If you want to live a positive good life, be good and be positive and kind! Be positive and you’ll definitely see changes within 2 weeks or so. And I gotta say that I’m working on myself on the third round. I’ve been through 3 depressive episodes and my recovery through my depression began: April 25, 2015 and I’ll be marking and celebrating my 5 years as of April 25 next year (2020).

Being in recovery for almost 5 years is a big accomplishment for me which is so important to me and close to my heart. What else is important to me is my ability and passion for my purpose and being creative as being creative in the group of creative arts is a very strong one. And when that gets taken from me and I get told to not be creative because it goes against the strict rules, I get hurt and I don’t like it so that’s another reason why I left: (the employment and job world which the government has big control over: has failed us).

To conclude on my life story is that my life is my very own and every detail not only expresses who I am and who I wanna be and also all that I’ve overcome and went through; I’ve become stronger and better because of it all!

Starting tonight, for the Gala, I wanna wear a black tuxedo dress as a reference to men’s wear statement that women can do anything that a man can do. No pantyhose.

I gotta be clear here on a few things briefly but with detail. For quite a few years now I’ve been a believer in self expression and creativity. And I believe that the more I’m especially encouraged and inspired to be creative and be myself, the more success, happiness, joy and more success I am truly capable of.

With that being said, when a company who I worked for 2 years tells me I have to sacrifice something that I value so very highly and strongly, I did it because I thought I had to in order to be accepted/validated/approved of. But deep down, no one should take a risk and sacrifice in order to be accepted as a proud associate/employee by management.

They should be accepted for who they are and what they’d bring to the company as expressed at their job interview, and be encouraged to share their creative ideas when coming across problems and other issues that come each day. They shouldn’t tell them they can but are given a specific limit of how far they can go. To me it felt like I was very limited to how much I could grow there and I didn’t like that at all. I felt like that was one specific thing that fed both my depression and anxiety. Like this quote states, I believe it relates and connects to how I feel about my experiences with Walmart, how other people have treated me and also including my own parents:

I am so tired of feeling trapped every hour of every day!

And I haven’t mentioned that with my parents, they have been emotionally abusing me for years and I have only become aware of it as of March 28, 2018! Since I’ve been having clear understanding of how my choices are my own and I shouldn’t give into the pressure and demands of my parents.

I have every right to choose what I want, how I want and when I want. It’s my life, and even though I may still be living under their roof for not much longer I hope; I believe I have every right to live my life however I want! Hey those things I want to do with my life don’t go against the rules and the law so what is my parents so against my dreams?

I do me, you do you. I don’t need nobody’s permission. ~ Ava Max

I just feel like if I don’t perform perfectly, I won’t be accepted by the royals, or by the people who see me as representing them and fighting for them. And today when it felt like even Harry wasn’t on my side, I just lost it. ~ Meghan

When you don’t have people on your side and even people who don’t have your back, it feels like such an experience that may not be so easy to explain in words. It’s something that also hurts deep within which also leads to lashing out, get worked up about being let down and mistreated, acting out from stressors and things that trigger/cause anxiety/panic attacks.

When you are in a place where you aren’t understood and even mistreated, you feel hurt and you just wanna go somewhere where you’ll feel safe and secure. Because like quoted from Jane The Virgin (Netflix series): “To be vulnerable in front of someone, you have to feel safe!” And I can so highly say that I didn’t truly feel safe and secure during my 2 years working at Walmart and nor have I with my parents.

But you’ve been fighting so many dragons this year: press, your father, but you’ve missed the one inside you: your fear of failure. You power yourself so fiercely that your unable to find a balance. And you fight hard to be yourself, fight hard to fit in, then your back to fighting to be yourself again. And then we’re all left wobbling.

I feel as though I’m just trying to get that “validation/acceptance/approval” from my parents and then somehow it was also at Walmart and I hoping that I would come to work each shift knowing I’d be walking away from my own home life and negative energies and all that go with my current and past circumstances with my parents.

But apparently I was wrong, I felt let down and I felt I couldn’t work as efficiently as I had liked to, on top of feeling tight with how much I could move and grow there. And when the management kept telling me to follow their strict rules and dress codes, I felt hurt that they couldn’t try to change them as change in tie kind of scenario is not bad in any way that I see.

In fact I believe that we all should inspire ourselves to make changes to our lifestyle or life in any area as change once in a while doesn’t harm us when we choose to work on feeling at peace with making new changes yet adapting to them! The world is changing and moving all the time, so why shouldn’t we change?

For example, many moments people act immaturely and the other person on the other side from their vision that the other person should work on themselves mentally and emotionally in the aspect of being more mature, selfless, kind, empathetic, compassionate, understanding, considerate, and other important qualities that we all should possess.

I’m not your robot, I’m just me! ~ Miley Cyrus, Robot

Control, power, empowerment, peace, war. What do these have to do with the topics I’ve covered that I can relate, connect and understand with Meghan Markle and the experiences she’s had through her transformation into the Royal family? Well a lot of these have to do with this huge post/article.

Meghan Markle has experienced control and power from the Royal family, empowerment from herself as she does she she knows best and is passionate about, war cake from the feud between her and her sister-in-law Kate Middleton along with her father who caused problems with the Royal family. And lastly: peace from which she chooses to give herself.

Which I’ve very strongly encourage her to learn to be at peace with how no one can control anyone else but their own selves and choose to listen to her heart as she did when she decided to say yes to Harry’s marriage proposal after they dated for a short period.

Inside of every princess, is a real dragon. You just need to be careful when and how you let it out!