7 Things I’ll Never See The Same Again, Thanks To Italy

Three and a half years ago, I traded overpriced Margheritas and grey skies for golden hour mornings and full-bodied red wines when I decided to ditch London and move to Rome.

I didn’t know exactly how it would pan out (because I didn’t have any plan whatsoever), but I did know it was going to be good. I knew life was going to get good.

And I somehow knew that even though I made the move with less than £800 in my bank account, no job waiting for me, and no housing plans other than a two-week Airbnb booking in an area I had done next to no research on.

Three and a half years later, I can say happily, that it absolutely did work out, and better than I ever could have dreamed of.

So I wanted to share some of the things that have completely changed for me since living in this ridiculously beautiful city of Rome. Things I just physically can’t see in my old ways anymore, even if I tried.

Quick disclaimer: These are all my very personal observations and experiences, I’m not generalizing the entire Italian race, just what I’ve seen and felt from my three and a half years living in Rome.

So in no particular order, here are seven things I’ll never be able to see the same, thanks to living in Italy:

1. Bad quality food

I mean, it’s Italy, so you were probably expecting this one. But living in Italy has really highlighted the fact that life is literally way too short for bad food.

In Italy, nobody jokes about the fact that they burn toast, or that the only thing they can cook is a boiled egg. People don’t find that funny here because being unable to take care of yourself by appreciating food is childish and unrelatable. Unlike in the UK, not being able to cook is actually something to be embarrassed about in Italy, and if you jokingly brag about it, you’d probably just get weird looks and an awkward laugh.

As well as that, most people here seem to really respect the seasonal changes of food, choosing produce that’s in season and avoiding produce that isn’t. I love this because it means I can be more intentional with my food choices, and pick the tastiest fruits and vegetables to nourish my body!

2. Hangover-free weekends

This is recent, but living in Italy (Rome in particular) has made me appreciate the mornings more than I ever thought I could.

And it’s not rocket science. Waking up on a Saturday morning with a pounding head and dry mouth after a night of binge drinking feels like such a criminal waste of time when you live within walking distance to something as breathtakingly beautiful as the Vatican.

I mean, how can you not feel like a massive piece of shit when you waste a full weekend nursing a hangover and trying to put together the pieces of a messy night when you have one of the most beautiful cities in the entire world at your doorstep?

In London, I’d waste so many weekends recovering on the sofa working my way through a giant packet of crisps and a bottle of Lucozade, watching seventeen episodes of whatever was on Netflix without even batting an eyelid.

Is this change due to living in Italy? I don’t know. Does living in Italy make me want to live my best life and enjoy the small things in life like nice Sunday mornings strolling around the Pantheon? I’m gonna go with yes.

3. My two healthy strong legs take me everywhere I want to go

I know that this is probably because I’ve been so lazy for most of my life, but I hardly walked ANYWHERE before I moved to Italy. I’d take a bus for five stops rather than walking for 20 minutes. An uber instead of getting the tube, and overpriced black taxis on drunken nights when even waiting six minutes for an uber seemed like a ludicrous waste of my time.

And I’m not the only one either because this runs true for the majority of my friends and family back in London. Since living in Italy though, just the mere thought of taking a bus rather than walking for 20 minutes seems unbelievably silly.

If anything, I’ll actively look for a route that I can do on foot as long as it’s under 30/40 minutes and I’m not in a rush. That’s both so I can get my steps in, and so I can enjoy the beautiful Eternal City.

And every time I do, I get a bit emotional because I realize how unbelievably lucky I am.

I’m lucky to be able-bodied and healthy and have two legs that can take me wherever I want to go. I’m lucky that I live in such a gorgeous place, where the simple act of going for a short walk feels like I’ve been let into the world’s most beautiful museum for free.

4. Guarding my time and energy

I don’t need to explain the rat race that is corporate London, or the ‘always-on’ mentality that is probably the biggest contributor to why we’re all so tense and anxious all the time.

But Italy is NOT like that. Not by a mile.

I see friends casually put their phones on silent for two hours during lunch, and I used to be mind blown. What if there’s an emergency??

It’s lunch, they’d say with an un-bothered shrug.

I see my boyfriend receive a phone call and calmly look at his phone and put it back in his pocket, still vibrating. Aren’t you going to get that???? “Nah. I’ll call back later,” he says. Calmy. Not a care in the world. No anxiety over what it could be regarding, or whether the caller would be offended. Nothing!

To add the cherry on this deliciously care-free cake, if you don’t want to do something (say someone’s invited you out for drinks and you just don’t feel like it), there’s a simple and beautiful phrase you can say in Italian that carries the weight of a thousand words, and it’s simply: non mi va.

It literally translates to “it doesn’t go with me”, and it’s the clearest way to simply say you’re not in the mood, you don’t feel like doing the thing, you don’t want to be persuaded, just no. And once you say non mi va, everyone else is just like “okay. No worries.” And that's it! It's understood that you’re just not up for it, and that’s that. No explanation necessary. It just doesn’t go with me, okay?

In Italy, people seem to respect and guard their time and energy more than in the UK, and it’s a breath of fresh air.

5. Fitting work around my life

Probably the most valuable change in my life since living in Italy for three and a half years is my change in work ethic.

If you’ve ever been to Italy, you might have noticed that the majority of shops will close for lunch usually anywhere from 1 pm all the way to 4 pm, when they’ll re-open for the afternoon.

When I first moved here, this infuriated me. I’d pop out to go cash a cheque at the bank during lunch only to find a paper sign taped to the doors that they’re closed for three hours slap bang in the middle of the day.

I’d go to pick up some vitamins from the pharmacy and see the same sign. I’d try to return a package at the local post office and you guessed it! Closed from 1 pm to 3 pm! Come back later!

Pretty much the only things that stay open during lunch hours are restaurants, bars, and coffee shops, and I hated it. Fast forward a few years though, and I find myself defending it to anyone who comes to visit me from London.

Everyone deserves to take a full lunch break to eat something nice, spend time with loved ones, and rest a little before starting the afternoon nice and energized. In London, my lunch break looked like a quick run to M&S for a sandwich and a packet of crisps, and back to my desk to eat. Even if I wasn’t actually working while eating, at least it looked like I was. #toxicAF

In Italy (in Rome and the south, anyway), work emergencies can wait. Lunch is to be enjoyed. Rest is to be prioritized. The 9–5 schedule of non-stop, unproductive work is just not that common here, and I absolutely am here for it.

6. It’s okay to talk to strangers

Before I moved to Italy, if a stranger started talking to me on the tube or while walking down the street, my instinct would probably be to hold my bag tighter or check my pockets to make sure they’re not trying to swipe my phone. That, or I’d just assume they were a bit loopy.

In Italy, everyone talks to each other.

Neighbours are friendly, shopkeepers know your name, supermarket cashiers ask what you’re planning to cook with the seasonal vegetables you’re buying.

And it’s totally normal. Nobody’s offended that you’ve disturbed their silence. Nobody looks at you weirdly for striking up a conversation with the person beside you while waiting in line.

Italians like to talk and connect with people, even with strangers. And while this made me uneasy when I first moved here, I quickly realised that my London mannerisms (antisocial, suspicious of strangers, aloof) stood out like a sore thumb in Italy. I’d constantly feel like a miserable dark cloud looming over happy, chatty people, and even though I wanted to join in, it just felt too alien to do so.

Now, though, catch me in the supermarket line asking the nonna in front of me for advice on how to make the perfect boiled artichoke for Sunday lunch. #NeverGoingBack

7. It’s not intrusive to ask people personal questions

This might be a bit controversial but I’m saying this as someone who has lived all her life in London knowing that “how are you?” rarely wants a genuine, honest answer.

One thing you need to know about conversations in Italy is that Italians talk about their personal wellbeing alot. I really mean alot.

Eg, if you ask the question “how are you?” to someone in Italy, be prepared for an honest answer, and NOT the obligatory “yeah, good thanks, you?”. In my experience, Italians are less bothered about coming across as intense or over-sharing and are more concerned with creating real relationships with people and sharing what’s on their minds.

That means if someone’s having a shitty day and you ask them how they are, you’re about to hear about it. If you ask someone how their day’s been and they had a stomach ache after eating a certain food at lunch, you best believe they’re going to share that with you, along with everything else they ate that day that might have caused it.

If they just argued with their girlfriend/boyfriend, well, you might as well just go grab a coffee because they’re probably going to tell you about that too!

This has actually happened several times. Here’s a real conversation that happened not long ago when I bumped into a friend in passing, and asked “Heyyy, how are you doing!” and they responded, “Honestly? Awful. Just terrible. I just broke up with my girlfriend and now I’ve found out she was actually cheating on me the whole time, can you believe it? What are you doing right now anyway, can we grab a coffee, let me tell you everything that happened.”

Like whooooa dude I was NOT prepared for that, but… okay, yeah!

My point is, Italians aren’t afraid of having real, human conversations.

What you see is what you get, they’re not worried that they’re going to bum you out by telling you what’s on their mind if you asked. On the contrary, you’ll likely get closer after it.

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Alright so I can definitely come up with at least 7 more things to add to this list but for the sake of keeping things short and sweet, I’m going to leave it here. Maybe I’ll write part two soon.