The Rainbow Agenda

Not a Wiki

Team Content Festember
The Festember Blog
8 min readJun 17, 2020

--

Poster credits: Rohinee Phatak, Graphique NIT Trichy

Who am I?

A question can carry the tidings of multiple existential crises, but that doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing. Within the rapidly expanding world of queerness, this question takes on a whole new dimension, brimming with labels, identities, orientations and so much more. It can be incredibly confusing, daunting even, so much so that one may even choose to do away with labels altogether.

In this piece, we wish to have a constructive conversation about what all of the above entails, and what it means to each and every one of us. It may lead to you discovering something new about yourself, discovering a name or a tag for something you knew about yourself but couldn’t pinpoint exactly, or quite simply you educating yourself.

And they’re all equally important and valid.

Love is love, and there is nothing wrong about it. Source: Unsplash

It’s important to understand the clear differences between the concepts that we’ve probably been confusing or interchanging without realizing. One’s biological sex, gender identity, sexual orientation and romantic attraction are all interrelated but not interchangeable at all.

The traditional representation of the sexual and gender minorities was confined to lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender as the letters ‘L’, ‘G’, ‘B’ and ‘T’ stand for, respectively. The term LGBT was coined in an attempt to evolve towards the inclusion and representation of the community, which was previously referred to as just the ‘gay community.

However, people soon began to realize that with newly emerging ideas on gender identities and sexual orientation, the LGBT abbreviation required a couple more letters. In the 21st century, the addition of the letter ‘Q’ was widely accepted, which stood for ‘queer’. Queer has gained acceptance as an umbrella term for sexual orientations after shedding its derogatory roots.

Sexual orientation is simply based on whom you’re sexually attracted to, if you are. You could be sexually attracted to someone of the same gender, the opposite gender or all genders; you could even be blind towards gender and sex. There are labels for several sexual identities too. For instance, skoliosexuality is a term for sexual attraction to people who are nonbinary or transgender.

Romantic and sexual attraction are often used interchangeably due to the fact that one form of attraction often leads to the other. However, they are capable of existing completely independently. For example, there are instances, like in the case of those who are heterosexual and aromantic, that cater to sexual attraction without the existence of any romantic intentions at all. Every one of us is wired differently and the way we react to these attractions are also unique. It’s possible to be romantically interested in multiple genders (or none) and have a different sexual orientation altogether.

Romantic attraction is concerned with a more intimate and emotional connect with somebody. You may not be sexually attracted to someone who you find yourself romantically attracted to, and vice versa.

You’re not alone. Source: New Indian Express

Presently, the acronym has been expanded to LGBTQIA+, where ‘I’ stands for intersex and ‘A’ stands for asexuality. The plus sign is included to cover the various other identities that aren’t included. As more people are coming to terms with their identities, studies also suggest that the LGBTQ youth are less likely to use the traditional labels and prefer to use lesser-known sexual/gender identities such as pansexual, asexual or non-binary.

There are two broad classifications on either end of the spectrum of sexual orientations — asexual and allosexual.

Allosexuality refers to people who experience any kind of sexual attraction. Or rather, it refers to those who do not identify on the asexual spectrum (which we shall get into later on).

Here’s a list of some major allosexual labels. However, this list is by no means exhaustive and it’s intended only as a vague guide to the more common ones:

Gay/Lesbian:

To begin with the most mainstream labels, these terms refer to sexual attraction towards cis men or women — of the same gender. These terms evolved as the term ‘homosexual’ began to feel clinical.

Pansexual:

This term refers to an attraction to someone regardless of their gender identity or biological sex. This term has recently gathered mainstream attention with several celebrities identifying as pansexual such as Miley Cyrus and Brendon Urie.

Omnisexual:

This term is often confused with pansexual. While pansexuality refers to a gender-blind attraction to people, omnisexuality is more indicative of an active sexual attraction to all genders.

Gynesexual/Androsexual:

People who identify as being attracted to females or the female anatomy, regardless of their own gender are referred to as gynesexuals. Similar to gynesexuality, those who find themselves exclusively attracted to males or their anatomy identify as androsexual. The terms ‘gynesexual’ or ‘androsexual’ are often used by people who are/experience attraction towards non-conforming gender identities.

Autosexual:

This refers to a sexual attraction towards oneself, however, this is not to be confused with the urge to masturbate.

Having spoken about allosexuals to a certain extent, let’s now move the discussion towards the other side of this spectrum: asexuality. Everyone has heard of it, but what exactly does the term mean? Who are asexual people?

The answer is quite simple — an asexual person doesn’t experience any sexual attraction and has no sexual feelings towards anyone. But it’s not to be confused with celibacy, wherein the individual chooses abstinence. Asexuality is more innate, where it’s seen as something you are, rather than what you choose to be.

But it’s natural for asexuals to experience other forms of attraction, wherein they desire to be in a romantic relationship or simply a platonic one. Asexuals experience aesthetic attraction where they’re attracted to physical features. They might also feel a deep, meaningful emotional attraction. In other cases, they just fall prey to society’s pressures to form a relationship.

Claiming the A in the LGBTQIA+ acronym, asexuals come under the queer umbrella with a strong identity with their own pride flag. Around 3% of the world’s population is estimated to come under the ‘Ace’ community.

There are well-known asexuals in popular culture — Jughead from the Archie comics, for example. Celebrated and loved detective Sherlock Holmes is asexual, as confirmed by Benedict Cumberbatch, who plays the character in the TV series. Other asexual TV characters include Todd Chavez from the Netflix series BoJack Horseman and Lord Varys, the royal advisor and eunuch from Game of Thrones. Authors like Keri Hulme and Morgan Bell, comediennes Janeane Garofalo and Paula Poundstone are also prominent members of the ace community.

“I serve the realm, my lord, someone must.” -Lord Varys. Source: Wallpaper Abyss

Many view allosexuality and asexuality as binary orientations, but in reality, they are the ends on a wide spectrum. The asexual spectrum (or a-spec) identifies many that fall under the asexual, agender and aromantic umbrellas, almost as diverse as the greater LGBTQ community itself.

An American NGO founded by the queer community, GLAAD, explains the Split Attraction Model for a better two-sided explanation, splitting sexual and romantic attraction into two separate notions, thereby creating a romantic counterpart for every sexual orientation.

People can identify themselves in numerous ways, depending on the different degrees of sexual or romantic attraction they feel. This can range from being completely non-existent to certain types of attraction towards their partners.

Over 150 different labels have been identified, and a few of those labels of the asexuality spectrum are listed below.

Demisexuals:

They don’t feel any attraction until a significant emotional bond is formed with their partners. This mostly works off of secondary attraction developed over time, wherein the person experiences an attraction based on their relationship and emotional connect.

Graysexual:

Someone who occasionally experiences sexual attraction but usually does not; it covers a kind of grey space between asexuality and sexual identity.

Reciprosexuals:

They do not experience an attraction to someone until they know the other person feels an attraction.

Aceflux:

It is when a person’s sexual orientation keeps fluctuating between asexual and sexual. Some may stay within the sexual spectrum while occasionally falling out of it.

Akiosexual:

It refers to the case when the person’s attraction lessens when it is reciprocated.

For a community claiming to have no sexual feelings, it may seem odd to the layperson that we have so many different labels under asexuality. But these adjectives and labels are used by asexuals to help them identify how and what they feel (or don’t feel) about sex and romance in general.

This seemingly excessive list is for people to understand the subtle differences in the kinds of attraction they feel, ultimately helping them comprehend their experiences better and identify themselves with labels that might give a sense of belonging.

Asexuality isn’t something to feel ‘weird’ or negative about — the implications on asexuals that they are unemotional, detached or lonely and fear intimacy because of trauma or mental disorder aren’t just degrading, but also inaccurate. Each individual desires different aspects of a relationship — be it romantic gestures, deep conversations or just a person with whom they find a sense of security which just doesn’t happen to include sex.

Moreover, asexual dating is becoming more and more common owing to the various online platforms to connect with others like themselves and share intimacy depending on their place in the asexual spectrum.

Online communities like the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) strive to create open and honest discussions about asexuality. Events like the Asexual Awareness Week (or the Ace Week) commemorated in the last week of October conduct workshops and organize events to educate people about the asexual spectrum, raise global awareness, spark discussion and discover more of the ace community, and with them more acceptance comfort and joy.

The list that’s been given above is in no way, shape or form, an exhaustive one. Every day, the definitions of attraction changes, accommodating newer and relatively unknown variables that contribute to sexuality and romanticism. It is perfectly understandable if you feel like you do not identify under any of the labels that we have given up until here, but if you feel inquisitive to find out more, you can always scrounge the interwebs.

But always remember, you are fine just the way you are and as Lady Gaga once said, “You’re on the right track baby, you were born this way.”

We hope you get started on your journey to sexual acceptance and expression. Click here to read the second part of this series, where we talk about gender, fluidity and the absolute choice to be whoever you want, however you want and whenever you want.

--

--

Team Content Festember
The Festember Blog

Team Content for Festember is the official literary team of Festember, NIT Trichy’s inter college cultural festival.