Need

The reek of the seedy hotel room clung to me. Shame made my cheeks burn as I hurried away from the flickering vacancy sign, my shoes slapping the pavement rhythmically, creating a cadence for my heart to follow. I wrapped the thin covering of my jacket around myself with shaking hands and, as the tears threatened, took comfort in the fact that soon this gnawing pain in my belly and oil slick fire racing through my veins and over my brain would be gone, replaced with satiation of the beast and tinkling laughter to soothe the flames.

I was drawing nearer my destination. The soft yellow glow of the streetlamps gave way to the harsh glare of neon signs. The empty streets from earlier were becoming overpopulated by cool men in flashy suits and loud women in leather and fishnets. My nose wrinkled as the fragrance of under-washed and over-perfumed bodies finally overwhelmed the hotel room stench. My stomach tightened and, even though it was empty, I thought I might vomit. My eyes searched for the man I was looking for and, just as I thought I might have missed him, there he was smiling and gesturing to me. I grinned and forced my way past the pimps, prostitutes, and pushers into the small store.

He bustled me inside, straight to the register. Two brown sacks sat there waiting for me. They were full of milk, cheese, bread, and eggs… all the essentials. I reached into my pocket to pull out the crumpled wad of bills I had saved for the last week, just for this. His hand reached out to cover mine and I flinched involuntarily. He pulled his hand back and shook his head.

“No. You tell that little angel of yours I said hello.”