Fieldwork makes me nervous

But it’s worth it.

This is what I mean when I say I overplan. TripIt for monitoring travel; Google Maps for checking traffic well in advance; ParkWhiz to mitigate parking panic; Toilet Finder to mitigate bathroom panic; Yelp app to make sure wherever I’m going has wifi and I can eat something vegan afterward; Two Dots in case the participant is late and I don’t want to be seen anxiously monitoring the door. And that’s all before I shake the participant’s hand.

First, there’s traveling to where your participant has identified as the right place for you to see what you want them to show you. I don’t love going new places, so there’s always some overplanning — Google maps, checking traffic days in advance, figuring out parking, making sure there’s a bathroom; the logistics are tough, not even counting recruiting in the first place.

Then, there’s meeting someone I don’t know. As an introvert, this is already rocky, but fieldwork means travel and travel means not being able to recharge using my own familiar routines. And as a woman, well, this can feel like a risk.

Then there’s the self-doubt: Will I know the right thing to say? What if I miss something and stakeholders decide the whole project is a bust? What if it’s awkward? Triple all of this if you’re bringing a stakeholder along because going in without a script — without control over what you’re going to get out of it — can feel like a crisis if you haven’t done it before.

But then you get to this moment: the point where the magic happens.

You’ve talked a little bit about how each of you got there, maybe you’ve complimented the participant’s shoes, or watch. Then all of a sudden there’s a subtle shift, like you’re moving into high gear. You’ve made a connection, you’re slipping into a groove — the self-doubt falls away because you remember how to ask and how to listen.

As much as I love this part and how good it feels to remember that I know how to do this, this is actually the part that makes me the most nervous because this is where participants get really honest. You’ve built something between yourself and the participant, and as much as I as an ethical researcher want to believe it only goes one way, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t affected deeply by my participants.

I’ve had participants tell me about tough childhoods, or about doing things that are definitely illegal. I had a participant talk about moving from Africa to the United States without being able to read or write her own name and the transformation that happened when she got access to education. I once had a participant misinterpret this connection and ask me on a date. Things can get intense.

And I’m grateful for that intensity, for what participants are willing to share with me that helps me tell the story of their lives, not just the pain points they encounter on a single platform. Turning stakeholders into advocates — that’s what powers a good user experience, and it’s the moments that participants share with me that make that possible.

I guess what really makes me nervous is that I fall in love with every participant just a little.

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Deirdre Costello is the Director of UX Research at EBSCO Information Services. She is a user experience professional passionate about discovering how technologies fit into users’ lives and their pursuit of information.