I am going to be a sister.
Umm What? I knew my dad and step-mom wanted to have a child. I have known this for three years, but for whatever reason I did not believe this would actually happen; that is until today.
My dad is 54, maybe 55 and my step-mom, Lisa, is 40 or 41. Starting a family this late in the game just seemed out of character for my dad, something he would be doing out of love for Lisa.
They are adopting a baby from a young couple—a married couple, both of whom are only a year younger than me. As I type this, my heart is racing, my head is pounding and I am struggling to comprehend what will happen if this couple decides to keep the child.
Needless to say, I am nervous, excited and a bit overwhelmed to become a sister at 23. One second I can’t wait to have a sibling, and the next it changes to wait—this little bundle of joy won’t be lucky enough to have the same amount of time with my Dad as me.
Honestly I’m leaning towards the ‘I can’t wait’ and this ‘baby can’t come soon enough’ side of the spectrum. At the same time, I am terrified that this couple will break my stepmom’s heart into a million little pieces come December by deciding that adoption is not the right decision for their family.
I wrote this ‘Dear Birth Mother letter’ last summer and re-reading it today only solidifies the need to think positive and believe that this couple will give my family the most extraordinary gift possible.
Dear Birth Mother,
I don't quite know how to articulate the love and friendship exemplified in the marriage between my father, Michael, and my step-mother, Lisa. They have been married now for four years and in that time they have come to embody a partnership full of respect, friendship and most importantly love.
I never thought that my dad would find a partner who brings out the best in him and who makes him so happy. I know that at this stage in life nothing would be more fulfilling to both of them than to finally be able to start a family of their own. Although I will be twenty plus years older than my future sibling and many people in my position would not outright embrace the thought of their parents having more children, I believe wholeheartedly that my dad and Lisa have the ability to be amazing, caring and loving parents to a newborn if afforded the opportunity to do so. From watching both of them interact with their niece (Lisa's sister's baby) Ella, they are ready to welcome a child of their own into our home. They seek out time to spend with Ella and both of them light up in such a touching way when they are around her.
It is important to know that my dad and Lisa have a strong and healthy marriage. They have the capacity to provide a child with a warm and loving home. Lisa has accepted me with open arms and has become someone I love and respect both as a parent and a friend. In the nine years that I have had the privilege to get know her, she has been nothing but loving and supportive, two qualities indicative of an individual who will undoubtedly make an extraordinary mother. I have faith and am fully confident that starting a family will allow them to share their love and generosity with a child of their own.
Sincerely,
Kelsey
Today I have learned a few things, one being that I still believe every word of what I wrote last summer, and another that I am finally going to have the sibling I always wanted. I am over the moon that in three months this adoption will happen, that I will have the privilege of welcoming my little sister into our family.
