Imposter in the gym
Before I was a PT I knew near nothing about training and what exercising in the gym TRULY meant. Like plenty of women across the globe, going to the gym meant; running on the treadmill/ using a cross trainer; stretching and a range of abdominal crunches.
How could that be if I was to soon be in charge of facilitating people achieving a fitness goal?! My LACK of inclusion at the gym is what powered my yearning to rid this attitude from the world. Despite being brought up in a western liberal environment, I was not encouraged to be active and fit throughout school. Yes, P.E. was mandatory, but, if you didn’t want to go to P.E. all you needed was a piece of paper with a scribble indicating that you were on your period, fraudulently signed by a ‘parent’. Sports and exercise were not ‘fun’ there was no consistency in what we ‘learnt’. P.E. was deemed by teachers as the, ‘it doesn’t matter what you do with them just get them moving lessons. On the whole, P.E. is not regarded with the same importance as any of the other lessons. I believe this is where the route of our issues lie. Now that I am older I understand the implications of PE being so negatively projected onto myself and plenty of other girls throughout their school years.
I think that, if the curriculum instilled the importance of exercise and fitness into young ladies from a younger age, women would be far more confident in gym environments as they got older. Instead, women in the gym are often quite apologetic about their very presence in such an environment. They confine themselves to the machines and stretching area, to avoid impatient stares that they would have to face if they even looked at some equipment in the weights area. I doubt women would be on such eggshells if PE was a whole hour of fun exercise, that involved some equipment, lots of guidance, but most importantly, with a teacher who constantly affirmed the message that girls are just as capable in being fit, as boys.
The other issue is family culture. You can excel, enjoy and love a subject or lesson, but if your family doesn’t support it, you are very likely to stop pursuing it. I have found that my client’s friends and peers that come from active FAMILIES are MUCH less daunted by the prospect of getting fit in the gym. Even if the type of exercise they did with their family was completely different to the exercise that will be done in the gym, they are way more up for the challenge than those who see getting fit as a totally alien concept.
‘Okay.. but what about boys? Their PE lessons were just as bad, probably had parents that were just as against them pursuing PE as a subject, yet they feel fine using whatever they want in the gym!’ — Said somebody who thinks I’m making a huge deal out of something so minor. Probably my dad..
Men are way more encouraged to be sporty than women ever were. Think back to a time you used to go to the park with your friends (boys and / girls) to have fun, run around / play hide and seek / even kick a football. Now think back to when it started to become more of a boy heavy concept.. For various reasons, girls just make the transition to socialising in other environments. You no longer find us up a tree, hiding.. This attitude continues and is proven when grown men will still ritualistically go for a kick about with their mates every Sunday, but women will go for a coffee with the girls. There is NOTHING wrong with different social interests across the genders, but I am just illustrating with real-life examples where and how these attitudes towards exercise fitness and the gym are formed.
Men become fit from all of the running around in the park kicking the ball. Men don’t use their Sunday kick about as a way of getting fit, they do it as a way of having FUN. That’s the main issue here, PE and being fit isn’t made to be FUN for women. If we want to get fit, it has to be quite a solo voyage. How many times do you see women post on social media about needing a gym buddy? Even when they have sourced a gym buddy, how often do you see them successfully go to the gym? Compare the above two numbers to the number of times you hear about the flakiness of their gym buddy and then eventually the attending stopping altogether. Sadly, the flakiness conversation and the ‘i’m putting the gym on hold for now’ chat wins.
I believe this is why classes are so packed with women. It’s the one domain of the gym where female camaraderie can be found. No prior arrangement, you can turn up to your class and be safe in the knowledge that there will be at least one other lady sweating her bits off.
My first few female clients convinced me to become a female-only PT. I recognised in them the same fears and worries that used to deter me from straying from my boring gym regime. The worry that you can’t go to the weights area because the men own it and it’s no place for little old me.
I was amazed at how many of my clients had never even SEEN some areas of the gym until we started training. They explained that they wouldn’t be confident enough to venture the depths of the building alone. I realised that for some of my clients my role was more of a shield than a PT. A shield from the prying eyes of fitter people that might be looking on and judging. Or the deviant glare of the men impatiently waiting to use a machine that you’re using. In many gyms, there is STILL almost a silent rule that if a woman is using something in the weights area, she will always be willing to give up her time with the equipment when someone else wants to use the same equipment. Especially if it’s a man.
It is also a given that women always need help, so if a woman is training and using fairly heavyweights the closest man must rush over and offer her a hand. These things never even triggered a response in me when I first became a PT. But now, they infuriate me. I am lucky enough to have been heavily socialised in these environments, so I am not phased when an ignorant male starts to de-load the lat pulldown machine whilst I am blatantly about to jump on again. I will happily tell him firmly and condescendingly that I am in fact visible and still using the machine he is about to steal. However, I can totally understand why women wouldn’t and why they wouldn’t even venture into the weights area. 15 year old me wouldn’t have either. Whilst I understand it, it doesn’t make me accept it. I implore every woman reading this to make a conscious effort to step into those uncharted waters. Stare back. You are allowed to use lighter weights than they are, or heavier! You have just as much right to be there.
If you have a daughter, get her outside just as much as her male peers. If you work in a school, even if you don’t teach PE, tell the kids in all of your classes, how important it is that girls get fit and enjoy exercise just as much as boys. RID the shame that clutters a female mind when they think about getting sweaty and smelly after a running around. Let’s correct the wrong messages we were given, for future generations.
Maya can be followed on Instagram at mayasaffronhan and Linkedin at Maya Saffron.
To book Maya as a PT: https://ebc.entirebody.com/services?plan_type=OCF&coach_id=6799&coach_name=&progress=2&country=uk
