Day 29 — “Team Up”; The Way of the Super Froth Bear — Part 2

Blogtober — Day 29, “still feeling fine!!”

Today I’m going to explore the second part of the Super Froth Bear motto… “Team Up.”

The full motto, as a reminder, is “Power Up, Team Up, Show Up!”

As mentioned before, Power Up is doing all the practices which turn on your physical, mental, emotional and social neurons, visceral organs, senses, and systems.

From that place, now it’s time to “find the others” as a great great and colleague Clare from The Flow Research Collective comes to mind when that phrase passes into my consciousness.

And think about it, if we Team Up when lacking our full power, we’re less able to intuit other’s intentions.. are more easily distracted and thus may appear uninterested… and find ourselves challenged to either maintain attention to others, the task, the outcome, or become more easily triggered or annoyed by others.

But when we’ve powered up our vagal tone, our frontal lobes, our heart’s braking system (the baroreflex written about in “Yoked to Breath — Part 1”), we’re more able to connect, sync and team up with others.

So why Team Up?! Because of that old corny acronym that’s why…

(T)OGETHER

(W)E

(A)CHIEVE

(M)ORE

I think about former NAVY SEALS Commander Curt Cronin’s speech at this year’s Flow Genome Project Coaches Certification training in regards to his teams. He described his team like that you would see in Star Wars… a very diverse looking group each with a particular skill set ranging from social, technical, tactical, and much much more. His statement, “how can we NOT win?!” has bounced around in my head and heart since then as he truly believed the diversity of the strengths and skill within his team would allow them to summit any obstacle they would be faced with.

Damn I want to be on a team like that!!

Now I’ve been on teams before.. starting with sporting teams as a young boy… unfortunately I was always, it seemed anyways, on the losing, or really the worst skilled teams. I hated that.

After high school I was fortunate to play on a 3-on-3 beach volleyball team who won several seasons of the local competition as we were a strong team. That was the team though that dumped me one season after I’d lost my cool and became very aggressive to my teammates during a grand final. I guess they had had enough of my bullshit… I don’t blame them.

Then, research teams at university.. including a group research project while in Maastricht while on study exchange. I recall a group member who continually didn’t do what he said he would. Eventually he pleaded to be allowed to stay in the group because it would mean he would have to repeat the subject next year. Unfortunately his behaviour had let him down and we couldn’t take the chance he wasn’t going to fulfill his role. I was at the front of the, “sorry mate, you let us down too many times… you’re out.”

We had to set standards, and the group had to be accountable to each other. Consequences are vital right?

We can also team up with others as accountability buddies.

This has been a game changer for me… not quite like a gym or workout buddy, which I rarely got in my gym and bodybuilding teenage years and 20s. More like two people who agree to check in daily, like a PM via WhatsApp, to say they’ve done something small they said they’d do daily. Whether breathwork, stretching, journaling, flossing their teeth, whatever. Doesn’t even have to be the same thing. And then, the consequences for failing. Buying the other person lunch, drinks or whatever.

Teaming Up also involves a “yes and…”

Approach as we’re open to others input, guidance and influence. Instead of, “yes but…” we can “yes and…” continue the flow of dialogue, practice, play, song, writing, whatever. The boat team Kokoro has been that for me… a place to dialogue, connect, share our journeys, challenges, insights, wins, and losses, and with that “yes and…” mentality help each other to see things from different viewpoints which can often be very helpful.

Knowing your role

Just like the days of old when the separation of duties in marriages was split between the man working for the dollar, and the woman the rearing and household duties, teams operate best when people are devoting their time and effort and energy into their unique strengths.

In fact, that’s exactly why the male work and female homebound doesn’t and hasn’t worked out. Everyone has different skills, passions, interests, and strengths and expecting people to fit into defined roles which are often in stark contrast to what lights that person up is a formula for burnout, resentment, and for predicting someone going awol.

But, when you’re able to show up, in a place where psychological safety is apparent, where you are respected, admired, valued, and have the agency and permission to take initiative, ownership and leadership of your part of the harmony (musical band analogy)….

We find great joy in finding our niche within a system.

Ultimately a soccer team has many players… we don’t need 11 goalkeepers… nor 11 strikers… we need a coach… field person… umpires… sponsors… team managers… etc etc etc. Everyone plays their part. Skills are only part of the puzzle.. whereas strengths are where it’s all at.

At the 2019 FGP Coaches Certification training Steven Kotler said those who spend the bulk of their time, effort and energy working from their top 5 strengths will live a life of flow.

Doing it on your own is definitely a way to power up and thrive… but who does it alone? WIth others we gain valuable feedback… encouragement.. and nudges to step up and do better or be better. Like on a expidition… like having a co-pilot. Korean co-pilots often wouldn’t fulfill their duties to the captain and allowed whole planes full of people to die rather than speak out against their captain… that wasn’t the way in Korea… that is when culture shapes what kind of rules are in place in our social teams. I gets complicated doesn’t it?!

In closeing… who can accomplish anything without others?

Self-made? Ha!!… they gave birth to themselves? They raised themselves? Give me a break!!

Much love… and remember to Power Up, Team Up… and then, bravely, as a cohesive, diverse and strength based team, SHOW UP!!