Friday the 13th Reboot Looks for New Director on Craigslist

Every filmmaker to direct a horror movie in the last five years has rejected the role. Now, the search for talent to lead the next Friday the 13th has gone to the bowels of the internet.

A Craigslist ad was posted on Monday titled “Looking 4 Director w/ Ability to Ignore Red Flags.” While the description does not directly reference the popular slasher franchise, fans are all but certain that the “established horror series featuring a machete, hockey mask, and an important date on the calendar” is Friday the 13th.

The ad goes on to list requirements of the director: “must commit without reading the script, work efficiently under the pressure of a publicly announced deadline, and be willing to make changes at the whim of an executive.” The full text of the ad can be seen at the bottom of the post.

A long list of names have been attached to direct the reboot of the Jason Voorhees slasher series, but those names come and go just as quickly as Camp Crystal Lake counselors. A filmmaker, who prefers to remain anonymous, recounted her experience with the producers: “After I declined, they called me night and day for two weeks, begging me to reconsider. I finally agreed to meet them in a public place. It was like turning down the desperate and sadly creepy guy in your apartment complex.”

Recent graduate of the USC film program, Miles Thompson, was admittedly intrigued by the ad. “I haven’t worked in months,” Thompson admitted, “But I dunno’ man…it seems pretty shady. Even if it is legit, I’m not sure I’d agree to waive my pay for an advance deal on Freddy v. Jason 2.” Thompson referred to an email exchange with the producers, in which they claimed that instead of a cash salary or even deferred payment, the director’s compensation would come in the form of receiving an opportunity to direct the vaguely planned sequel to 2003’s Freddy v. Jason.

Despite the protracted quest to find a director, the proclaimed 2017 release date has not budged. Until then, meetings will be arranged at the Denny’s on Sunset with the potential new voices of Friday the 13th.