A to Z: Unpopular Self-Help Books
by Molly Pohlig
All by Yourself? You Know There’s a Reason
Because I’m Worth It: How to Get Your Man to Realize You are a Disney Princess and Deserve to Be Treated as Such
Cuttings: Creative and Therapeutic Uses for the Numerous Heads of Ex-Boyfriends That You Cut Out of Photographs After They Dumped You
Do You Want to Be Rich? Stealing is Easier than You Think!
Equus in Pink: Getting to the Root of Little Girls and Their Somewhat Disturbing Love of Horses
Fix You: Self-Healing through the Ballads of Coldplay
Give Me an A!: How to Be Your Own Cheerleader (Includes Uniform Options, Basic to Advanced Cheers, and Easy-to-Learn Choreography)
Heaðufremmende Cásus (Fighting Words): How to Stun Your Enemies and Build Self-Confidence by Learning Old English
It’s Not You, It’s — No, Wait, It’s You. It’s Definitely You
Just the Way You Are: Face It, It’s Pretty Bad
Kicking the Habit: Get Out Aggression Safely, Take it Out on a Nun’s Costume
Lathyrism, Birdshot chorioretinopathy, and Malonyl-CoA Decarboxylase Deficiency: A Hypochondriac’s Guide to Very Rare Illnesses to Ask Your Doctor If You Have
Mother’s Love: How Self-Swaddling Can Mend Parental Relationships
No More I Love Yous: A Step-by-Step Guide to Complete Emotional Isolation
Over My Dead Body: A Handy Book of Catchphrases Guaranteed to Annoy Your Teenager
Pickling for Mental Health
Quiet, I Get Nauseous When Your Voice Reaches That Decibel: New and Improved Excuses for Every Occasion
Really, Your Butt Looks Fine in Those Jeans! The Art of Lying to Save the Relationship
Spies Like Us: Never Get Caught Going Through Your Boyfriend’s Email Again (Don’t Stop Doing It, Just Learn How to Avoid Detection)
They’re Grrrrrrrrrrrreat! The Tony the Tiger Mother’s Guide to Raising Children
Until It’s Over: How to Delay, Avoid, and Generally Confuse the Loved One Who Wants to Break Up With You Until They Give Up and Settle Down
Venn You’re Ready: Organizing Your Life through Venn Diagrams
Widow’s Weeds: From Ebony to Jet to Onyx and Back Again, the Limitless Possibilities of a Mourner’s Wardrobe
Xakly Who I Want 2 B: Daily Affirmation Texts
You Talkin’ to Me? Five Easy Steps to Ensure You Never Take the Blame for Anything Ever Again
Zap That Fat! Weight Loss Through Gentle Taser Application
Photo via quinnanya/flickr.
Previously: Discarded Cosmo Sex Tips
Molly Pohlig lives in Brooklyn and works in publishing. She does not own a hedgehog, but is hoping this situation will be rectified soon. She can also be found at Irish lady website www.fanny.ie.
