Couple Powered

Take time, revisited

Image: nekotank, Art: Silvia

Dunno if you heard but there was a breakup yesterday between famous people (I bet you know who I’m talking about so I don’t even have to say). I mean it probably definitely happened A LONG time ago according to people who read Lainey Gossip. But in medialand it happened yesterday and suddenly if you were a news outlet it was TAKE O’CLOCK. WHO WILL BE HOLLYWOOD’S NEXT POWER COUPLE, nobody really asked, but the media published anyway. Take Time ensued.

What’s Take Time, you ask? The term was coined by emeritus Awl editor John Herrman, specifically in reference to the fappening but generally in reference to the media’s duplicative tendencies. Herrman writes:

In such a situation the internet’s craving for sex and humiliation is effectively infinite. This throws the Content industry into a frantic generative mode, initiating a full-spectrum stress test on par with a natural disaster or a war. This weekend was a consumption bonanza, a historic seller’s market for Content. This was no time for mere reports and analysis, no, that would never be enough. It was Take Time.

Take Time, the internet’s evolutionary defense against attention surplus, can be large or small, quick or long. A simple form of Take Time is the post-gaffe rush, which usually looks something like this, and occurs over a period of a few hours.

Yesterday that period happened starting at 9:54:54.650 A.M. EDT (yeah I know how to view source code, check me out)

Who Should Succeed Brad and Angelina As the Most Powerful Power Couple?

Agence France Press via Yahoo had a similar post that wasn’t timestamped but I’m putting it way up here because presumably it was on Paris time, which even though it’s later, is technically ahead. Don’t overthink it.

'Brangelina' split: Five other Hollywood power couples

This one is included as a variation on a theme, Sep 20, 2016 3:02 pm ET

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie: A Look Back at Hollywood's Biggest Divorces

and then SEPT. 20 2016 4:05 PM

A Power Ranking of Our Most Precious Commodity: Remaining Power Couples

and September 20, 2016 4:34 p.m.

Which A-list Couple Will Ascend Brangelina's Throne?

Sep 21 9:16 AM ET

How Brangelina went from being the power couple of the decade to our last hope for true love

September 21, 2016 9:30 am

Power Couples and Power Dressing Are On Everyone's Minds as Milan Fashion Week Gets Underway

My favorite I think is from today, Wednesday, September the Twenty-first, at Ten twenty-five ante meridiem, from Vanity Fair’s Hive via Poynter.org’s James Warren—this is not strictly the same thing but more of a roundup of the first one and also it doesn’t really answer the question it just says that a publisher published views from its staff, so that is media news of a kind (that even I am participating in here!!)

Who Will Be America's Next Power Couple?

Carson Daly c’mon man!

Mornings With Carson Daly Guess Who Will Be Hollywood's Next Power Couple

More: Wed, Sep 21, 2016 12:21 PM

Why Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie Will Be Just Fine

September 21, 2016 at 03:00PM

Were Brad Pitt And Angelina Jolie Hollywood's Last Power Couple?

SEP 21, 3:12 PM EDT

Angelina Jolie Brad Pitt Divorce: Which Hollywood Power Couple Will Break Up Next?

YO PROPS TO INQUISITR FOR GETTING THERE SIX MONTHS AGO ON MARCH 10, 2016 ANNO DOMINI

Bradley Cooper And Irina Shayk Become New Brad Pitt And Angelina Jolie

So who will it be? Publishers and Facebook! Haha just kidding.