Imaginary Lines From an Imaginary 9/11 Sex and the City Episode

by Lauren Bans

“Meanwhile uptown, Samantha was having a few explosions of her own.”

“It was at that moment Charlotte resolved that if her fellow countrymen were brave enough to revolt against knife-wielding hijackers, the least she could do was take off her bra during sex.”

“Ooooh! Oooh! New Blahniks! AL BUYDA!”

“Later that day I got to thinking about Muslims and relationships. If I couldn’t even tell Big that I was upset about our dinner, was I really any more liberated than a veiled woman? How do we New York women take off our emotional burkas?”

Samantha: “Oh please, you don’t think he’s a little cute?”
Charlotte: “Samantha, no! How can you say that? He just masterminded the killing of 3,000 Americans!”
Samantha: “Probably because he hasn’t Bin Laiden in a while.”

Lauren Bans is a culture writer at The Daily.