My Beauty Regimen

Jane Hu
The Hairpin
Published in
2 min readJan 9, 2014

It turns out that the Montreal bathroom cabinet of Jane Hu, age 25, looks sort of like a CVS shelf in the midst of a hurricane warning.

SKIN CARE

I get up a couple hours before I’m supposed to leave in the morning and I’ll practice piano. Sometimes I moisturize before going outside. I like grabbing whatever is closest to me — usually body lotion, which I take to mean can be used for the whole body, including face. Lubriderm fulfills the same function.

I slather myself with body lotions. It’s pretty easy and cheap, but it works.

On a recent plane ride, I rubbed hand lotion over my face. It’s really hydrating, so I don’t look like a prune after flying.

I frequently go to bed with makeup on. I’m a busy girl. I don’t get clogged pores. Seriously, scientifically, what is happening there?

MAKEUP

I was told years ago by this magazine that I shouldn’t leave the house without makeup on. Other people might take offense if you don’t.

I like eyeliner because my eyes need all the widening they can get. Mascara, too.

Foundation is a nightmare. Do they make foundation for my skintone? I’m Chinese, so, asking for literally a billion people.

HAIR

I use shampoo. Sometimes I buy curl-enhancing shampoo, for funsies.

For cuts, I’m not fussy. I’ve been to all sorts of hair salons in Canada, and they always fuck it up because, “Wow, your hair is really thick.” Once my hairdresser gave me a bob and then said at the end, “You look like bubble tea girl.” There are so many fantastic haircutters in the city. Everybody’s hair looks much better than it used to. [Ed. note: Thank you.]

SERVICES

I tried to get my eyebrows done before, but they were like, “I’m sorry, I can’t do anything with your non-existent arches.”

I’ve been told I have really nice piano hands. Thanks, but all credit goes to the Lubriderm. The ‘derm, I like to call it.

FITNESS AND DIET

Practicing piano is a necessary part of the day. I practiced this morning. I like to run, but I don’t have enough time to do it. My secret is I eat poutine every single day and I pour maple syrup in my shoes. It’s very important. You can be the most beautiful person on earth, and if you’re not white, thin, or a unicorn, you won’t be beautiful.

Previously: In Praise of Adèle Exarchopolous

Photo via slice/flickr.

Jane Hu is a writer living in Montreal.

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