Poems on the End of the Academic Semester

Poem on Missing Receipt Affidavits

You will need
To fill out
Missing receipt affidavits
For all of your
Missing receipts.

Poem on Technology

Please join us tomorrow
To learn how
We’re using technology
Across campus
And register to win
An iPad Mini.
Technology
Is very important
To the university,
Although the AV
Equipment
In your classroom
Hasn’t worked
For years.

Poem on Sustained Dialogue

Sustained dialogue is
A method of facilitated,
Ongoing discussion.
If you would like
To engage in
Authentic and open
Dialogue,
Please sign up
By Friday.

Poem on a Colleague’s Musket

At a campus event
This evening,
A professor
Will talk nonstop
For ten minutes
About his antique musket
And will neither
Allow for
Nor require
A response.

Poem From a Student Regarding a Meeting

This is just to say
That I can’t make
Our meeting
Today
But I am free
Tomorrow
At 2.

Poem From the Administration on That Tenure Line

You can’t have
The tenure line
That you requested,
But thank you
For asking
All the same.

Poem on a Male Colleague’s Thoughts on My Clothing

You really don’t need
To dress up, you know.
I mean, I don’t worry
About that sort of thing.

Poem on Incompletes

As we approach
The submission of final grades,
Know WHEN IT IS APPROPRIATE,
AND WHEN IT IS NOT
To assign an “Incomplete”
Or change a submitted grade.

Poem on a Faculty Meeting

At our next meeting,
The faculty will vote on
A posthumous
Degree policy.

Poem on Interactions With Colleagues on the Last Day of Classes

You going anywhere for winter break?
You going anywhere for winter break?
You going anywhere for winter break?
You going anywhere for winter break?
You going anywhere for winter break?
You going anywhere for winter break?
You going anywhere for winter break?
Yes.