The 10 Worst Nail Polish Names from Pure Ice

by Lily McLemore

Pure Ice, a nail polish brand sold exclusively at Wal-Mart, specializes in trendy shades with disturbing names. Here are some that will make you wonder, “Who are these people, and what is wrong with them?”

1. Jail Bait

A vibrant lilac on-trend for Spring, “Jail Bait” also promotes a fun phrase used to sexualize young girls and uphold rape culture!

2. I’ll Behave

Emerald, the hot new color invented this year, pairs perfectly with submissive behavior, also invented this year.

3. Nasty Girl

Do not confuse with the below.

4. Naughty Girl

They are ENTIRELY different girls.

5. Private Show (formerly known as Five-Some)

It was a Seven-Some, but Naughty Girl and Nasty Girl got drunk and passed out. Now it’s just a lame Private Show and everyone wants their money back.

6. From left to right: Not Now, No Means No, Iced Merlot, All Night Long

The Fall 2013 line up! It’s a date rape scene with coordinating colors! What a fun idea.

7. Saddle Me Up

Perfect for when you want to wear your saddle to work. WARNING: If you wear this polish with the electric blue “On His Saddle” as an accent, you turn into an actual horse.

8. Black Out (formerly known as Black Rage)

It’s debatable, whether or not the bizarre humans responsible for naming this polish were aware of what they were referencing.

9. Tame Me Now

I’m waiting.

10. First Time

And last!

Lily McLemore lives in Nashville. She likes all sorts of food.