Choosing Your Words Carefully Makes Love Last
Communication with empathy is key.
One significant lesson I learned from being married for ten plus years is that you can’t take words back once they’ve been said, or screamed.
Words are tactile. They have the power to seep into everything around you if harsh enough. They can become part of the furniture, they can hang in the air permeating every part of the room with tension and regret.
Sex? You want me to have sex with you after what you just said to me? You must be kidding.
Maya Angelou said,
“Words are things, I’m convinced. I think they get on the walls. They get in your wallpaper, they get in your rugs and your upholstery and your clothes. And, finally, into you.”
I believe Dr. Angelou was correct.
Words hold so much meaning — words harm. Harsh words from a parent or lover or a sibling can stay with you for years.
In marriage, brutal honesty, intense bickering and cold standoffs lead to contempt. And contempt, in a marriage, is one of the hardest things to come back from, it is almost impossible, too much is broken to put back together.