10 things we learnt about parenting through a pandemic

“Self-care is child care” Kim McCabe

It’s tough enough running a business during a pandemic, but throw in kids and home schooling and things get, well, interesting.

On today’s Friday Fireside we were joined by parenting expert and author Kim McCabe. Kim is the founder of Rites for Girls, and helps children and (their parents) learn how to take charge of their emotional, social and spiritual wellbeing.

Kim is a regular on our Firesides, always offering sage advice in the chats and today it was her turn to join us on the show.

We discussed:

• The challenges of being present for our kids during this pandemic
• Preparing our children for this new world
• The pressure of being a ‘good’ parent
• The fundamental needs of an entrepreneur right now

Here are the takeaways from our conversation:

1. You don’t have to be everything to everyone
   As parents and business owners we can feel like we need to be the hero all the time, but this is setting yourself up for failure.
2. You can’t do it on your own
   In the past parenting was a communal activity, shared by friends, neighbours and extended family. So don’t struggle alone, ask for help when you can, even if it’s just a listening ear.
3. Find your parenting mentors
   What can you learn from those who seem to find parenting easy or enjoyable? Like in business, make the time to find role models you can get inspired by. There’s no need to reinvent the wheel.
4. Parenting is a process of letting go
   Parenting, like entrepreneurship, is about letting go. As our children get older we need to let go of control if we are to allow them to make their own mistakes and find their path in life.
5. Trust is key — in yourself and children
   There are thousands of books that can tell you how to parent, but ultimately it’s about finding your own style that works for you. Learn to trust your intuition and in turn trust your kids to do the right thing.
6. There is no right or wrong way to parent
   What works for one person or family might not work for you. Don’t compare yourself to others or be too hard on yourself if your way differs from others.
7. Ask less of yourself, something has to give
   Entrepreneurs are great at continuously moving the goalposts and making life more difficult than it needs to be. So lower your expectations and accept you can’t do it all, whether at work or home.
8. Be the enabler rather than director
   Just like in leadership, our role as parents is best seen as that of an enabler rather than the more unhelpful control freak.
9. Don’t just let money decide who does what
   If you’re struggling with juggling parenting roles, don’t just let who earns the most decide whose job is more important. Have adult conversations to ensure you get the balance right and show your children what equality looks like.
10. It’s never too late to do your best parenting
    Kim shared the story of how her and her mum have ‘Mother and Daughter dates’ even today. These are powerful ways to right any wrongs from the past and create space for healing.

🎥 Watch the replay on Crowdcast

ps. We’re hosting a one day happy startup workshop on Zoom next Thursday for a small group of entrepreneurs. If you want to bring your ideas to life in 2021 check it out.