10 Signs That Usually Mean He’s Just Not That Into You (But Not This Time)
Ten Signs That Deep, Deep, Deep Down, He Really IS Into You
#1 He doesn’t recognize you when you meet him on the street.
You’ve identified yourself at least five times as you approached him: “Hi, Trevor! It’s me! Jenny! Jenny. The girl you met at the gym. Whose name begins with a J. And rhymes with penny. Penny for your thoughts? Jenny!” He still gives you a blank stare. It could be that he just needs glasses.
#2 He refuses to give you his phone number.
Luckily you are acquainted with his cousin Marcy, and you are able to get his digits by pretending you lost your phone and all your contacts, and you tell Marcy that you’re embarrassed to ask him directly, because he’d warned you about leaving your phone in random places. He’s so caring! Or he would be if he had actually said that to you! You may need to remind Marcy that your name is Jenny.
#3 He’s visibly annoyed every time you visit him at work.
Is it your fault that your daily power walk leads directly into the garage at Dave’s Gulf Station? You try not to bother him, and when you deliver the homemade cookies, you always remember to bring some for Dave and the other mechanics. But even this kind gesture is rebuffed. Maybe he’s watching his weight. Maybe tomorrow you’ll bring him an apple instead.
#4 He ignores your friend request on Facebook.
While it’s true that most people your age are not on Facebook much, you happen to know he is active because you can see some of his photos when you check. Some of his photos feature a strange girl. Probably another cousin! But he seems awfully fond of her.
#5 He tells his cousin Marcy to tell you to just, for God’s sake, leave him alone.
He’s undoubtedly under a lot of stress, poor lamb. This is the time to be extra-present for him, texting him several times a day with words of love and encouragement. He never responds, but maybe Marcy accidentally gave you the wrong number for him. When you ask her, she says, “It wasn’t an accident.” What does she mean, you wonder?
#6 He gets engaged.
You hear through the grapevine that he is planning to marry someone named Becky, who it turns out is the girl in the FB photos. This is clearly a rebound thing, and you must stop him before it’s too late. Declare your feelings boldly! He’s much too good for the likes of Becky, and he needs to get that wake-up call from YOU.
#7 He takes out a restraining order.
This seems a bit extreme. We all need our “space” from time to time, though, and maybe this is merely his way of saying that your relationship is moving a little too fast. Back off just the teensiest bit for the next few days. He will surely come around, and it will be a funny story to tell your kids someday. Meanwhile, hiring a private detective to follow him might give you some peace of mind. Something to consider!
#8 He gets married.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! He seems to have rebounded a bit too much! But it’s never too late to make things right. Find the newlyweds’ address (Marcy might be a resource here, or there’s always White Pages Premium) and drop by to “congratulate” Becky. While there, apologize to her for breaking her heart, then inform her of the existence of your’s and Trevor’s love child. You do not yet HAVE a love child, but that is a quibble. Leaving Becks a card with the name of a good divorce lawyer would be a very thoughtful touch.
#9 He files charges against you.
Not to worry! What are you guilty of? Only of devotion. Only of unshakeable affection. Maybe breaking up his marriage with a bald-faced lie wasn’t your best move, but there’s nothing illegal about it! Perhaps spray painting “You’re Mine, Trevor! Mine, I Tell You!” on his new car is a misdemeanor, though. Offer to have the car detailed if he’ll drop the charges.
#10 He moves across the country without telling you.
No doubt he doesn’t want to hurt you, but that job offer in Death Valley was just too tempting to resist. Make sure you let him know that you will get right to work finding an apartment and a new career in Death Valley yourself. He’ll be thrilled!
So, now that you think about it, these are actually Ten Signs That Deep, Deep, Deep Down, He Really IS Into You, After All!
Whew!! What a relief!
