30 Reasons Why Guns Are Needed in Schools

By Betsy DeVos, Nominee for Secretary of Education

A grizzly bear invades a gun free school. Tragedy ensues.
  1. Grizzly Bears
  2. Zombies
  3. Aggressive PTA Parents
  4. Clowns
  5. ISIS
  6. The Joker
  7. Rabid Dogs
  8. The Manson Family
  9. Barack Hussein Obama
  10. The Cast of Hamilton
  11. Heathens
  12. Ninjas
  13. Venus Fly Traps
  14. Flying Monkeys
  15. Libertine Men and Scarlet Women and Ragtime! Oh We Got Trouble! Right Here in River City!
  16. Satan
  17. Hungry, Hungry Hippos
  18. Pirates
  19. Rachel Maddow
  20. Dinosaurs
  21. Hannibal Lecter
  22. Vampires
  23. Apostates
  24. Aliens
  25. Great White Sharks
  26. Darth Vader
  27. Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My!
  28. Meryl Streep
  29. The “Public” Part of Public Schools
  30. Voldemort

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