ACADEMIA HUMOR
A Letter Home from School
Including Endnotes
Dear Mom and Dad,
I hope this letter finds you in the best of health and happiness. I’ve been at MIT for a few weeks now, and boy, do I have a lot to tell you. First of all, the workload is insane! I spend around 30 hours a week just on problem sets[1]. Can you believe it? And that’s just for calculus! The problems involve integral and differential calculus, concepts I thought I had mastered but now seem far more complicated[2].
In Intro to Biology, the lab work involves extracting DNA and then there’s a midterm on cellular structures[3]. You’d think they were training us to clone dinosaurs or something. Oh, and don’t even get me started on my Artificial Intelligence project. I have to build a chatbot that can answer questions about the U.S. Constitution[4]. I’m genuinely struggling with the algorithmic complexity of it all[5].
In Green Computing, I have to design a solar-powered phone charger[6]. For Intro to Solid-State Chemistry, I need to create a 3D model of a crystal lattice structure[7]. I also have a physics lab where we’re using pendulums to understand principles of motion[8], and Ethics in Engineering is making us study the ethical considerations in self-driving cars[9].
As if that weren’t enough, they’re conducting random checks on assignments for academic dishonesty[10] and have a mandatory workshop on how to avoid plagiarism[11]. In terms of collaboration, I’m part of a study group where we discuss the week’s calculus problems[12], but it’s honestly hit-or-miss in terms of usefulness[13].
Now, about the campus life. The cafeteria food is not the best, leading students to opt for the expensive vending machines instead[14]. Dorm life is pretty claustrophobic, with ear-piercing noise levels that make it hard to focus[15]. Loneliness and isolation are real problems, despite the number of people around[16]. On-campus talk therapy techniques are available, but student morale is still low[17]. Alcohol and drug use seem to be on the rise in dorm rooms[18].
But don’t worry about me! In between all of this, I’ve found time for my usual pastimes like Slacklining in the dark between tall buildings and Blindfolded Mountain Biking. As they say, “College is the best time of your life[19].”
So, what’s up with you?
Love,
Leonard
P.S. I know it sounds like a lot, but as Einstein once said, “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe[20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [25] [26].” I guess we’re all learning here!
[1] Beattie, G., Laliberté, J.W.P., & Oreopoulos, P. (2018). Thriving or Surviving? The High Cost of High Achievement. Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization.
[2] Zimmerman, B.J. (2000). Self-Efficacy: An Essential Motive to Learn. Contemporary Educational Psychology.
[3] Schwartz, M.S., Sadler, P.M., Sonnert, G., & Tai, R.H. (2009). Depth Versus Breadth: How Content Coverage in High School Science Courses Relates to Later Success in College Science Coursework. Science Education.
[4] Graesser, A., & McNamara, D.S. (2010). Self-Regulated Learning in Learning With Intelligent Tutoring Systems. Learning and Instruction.
[5] Kirschner, P.A., Sweller, J., & Clark, R.E. (2006). Why Minimal Guidance During Instruction Does Not Work. Educational Psychologist.
[6] Pearlmutter, B.A., & Hinton, G.E. (1986). Learning Strategies in Stereo Vision. Complex Systems.
[7] Goodsell, D.S., Olson, A.J., & Forli, S. (2020). The AutoDock Suite at 30. Proteins.
[8] Peters, M. (2005). Does the Quality of Instruction in Introductory Physics Influence Student Learning Strategies? Physics Teacher.
[9] Goodall, N.J. (2016). Away from Trolley Problems and Toward Risk Management. Applied Artificial Intelligence.
[10] Bretag, T. (2013). Challenges in Addressing Plagiarism in Education. PLOS Medicine.
[11] Carroll, J., & Appleton, J. (2001). Plagiarism: A Good Practice Guide. Oxford Brookes University.
[12] Springer, L., Stanne, M.E., & Donovan, S.S. (1999). Effects of Small-Group Learning on Undergraduates in Science, Mathematics, Engineering, and Technology. Review of Educational Research.
[13] Cuseo, J. (1992). Cooperative Learning vs. Small-Group Discussions and Group Projects: The Critical Differences. Reading Research and Instruction.
[14] Smith, S. (2016). Comparing the Nutritional Impact of Dietary and Environmental Interventions on a University Campus. Ecology of Food and Nutrition.
[15] Blascovich, J., & Tomaka, J. (1991). Measures of Self-Esteem. Measures of Personality and Social Psychological Attitudes.
[16] Leary, M.R., & Baumeister, R.F. (2000). The Nature and Function of Self-Esteem: Sociometer Theory. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology.
[17] Seligman, M.E.P., Ernst, R.M., Gillham, J., Reivich, K., & Linkins, M. (2009). Positive Education: Positive Psychology and Classroom Interventions. Oxford Review of Education.
[18] Johnston, L.D., O’Malley, P.M., & Bachman, J.G. (2003). Monitoring the Future National Survey Results on Drug Use, 1975–2002. National Institute on Drug Abuse.
[19] Einstein, A. (1920). “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.” Essays in Humanism.
[20] “Albert Einstein: Quotes He Never Said and Other Facts.” Snopes.Com, https://www.snopes.com/collections/albert-einstein-collection/. Accessed 7 Apr. 2022.
[21] Gestalt Therapy | Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapy-types/gestalt-therapy. Accessed 7 Apr. 2022.
[22] Perls, Frederick S. Ego, Hunger and Aggression; London, G. Allen and Unwin ltd, 1947. Internet Archive, https://archive.org/details/egohungeraggress0000perl_x5q6.
[23] Gestalt Therapy Verbatim. [Lafayette, Calif., Real People Press], 1969. Internet Archive, https://archive.org/details/gestalttherapyve00perl.
[24] In and out the Garbage Pail. [Lafayette, Calif., Real People Press], 1969. Internet Archive, https://archive.org/details/inoutgarbagepail00perlrich.
[25] Two Things Are Infinite: The Universe and Human Stupidity — Quote Investigator. https://quoteinvestigator.com/2010/05/04/universe-einstein/. Accessed 7 Apr. 2022.
[26] Wednesday, James Trefil |. Published:, et al. “Einstein’s Relativity.” Astronomy.Com, https://astronomy.com/magazine/2016/02/how-einsteins-relativity-changed-the-universe. Accessed 7 Apr. 2022.