American Legends: Mike the Tuna Fish Man

It was the 1930s in New York City. Times were tough; money was scarce, and a good tuna was almost impossible to find. But not for those who knew the man they called “Mike”. For it was he who would scour the depths of the great Atlantic Ocean for weeks until he had enough tuna fish on his boat to feed an army. Crowds would gather by the docks to wait for him to sell them his fine fresh tuna.

But it was not always like this. Why, when Mike first started selling his fish, no one would give him the time of day. He’d walk the streets for hours banging on doors. “Who is it?”, they’d ask. “It’s Mike the tuna fish man”, he would cheerfully reply. They’d open the door and there he’d be with his trench coat wide open and tuna fish of all sizes dangling from each side. Many a door was slammed in his face. But he never gave up hope. Eventually, after he became a familiar face in the neighborhood, some folks decided to give him a try. A finer tuna fish they had never tasted.

As word of mouth spread and more and more people gave him a chance, Mike and his tuna became very popular. Eventually, Mike made his way from one end of Manhattan to the other. He would lug his fish up to Harlem and then down to Chinatown and Little Italy where he was affectionately known as “Grande Salmone”. In other parts of town, they sang songs about him. One of his favorites was “The Big Kahuna with the Tasty Tuna”.

All, however, was not roses for Mike the tuna fish man. There was one time when manufacturers of canned tuna fish put a contract on Mike’s life. A hit man shot Mike, but the bullet became lodged in the belly of one of the many tuna fish that he carried. Mike captured the assailant and turned him over to the police. The arrest led to the great Tuna Fish Scandal of 1936. Three executives of Tuna Inc. were indicted and eventually convicted of racketeering and of ordering the attempted assassination of Mike the tuna fish man.

Mike knew tuna fish. If ever a man knew a fish, it was Mike. People would come from miles around to ask Mike about tuna fish. Mike could tell you a thousand ways to cook tuna; how to use tuna to decorate your home or improve the gas mileage in your car. “A tuna”, Mike used to say, “is a whole lotta fish”.

Mike was a charitable man. Often times if a family could not afford his price, he would secretly leave a tuna by their doorstep with a note explaining that the fish was left there by its mother so that it could be eaten by a good family. He would attend church regularly and frequently visit orphanages where he would teach children important skills such as scaling or fileting. The kids loved him, and he relished the opportunity to expose himself to them.

Celebrities would often buy fish from Mike. Some of his more famous clientele included: Grete Garbo, Clark Gable and James Cagney just to name a few. One of Mike’s favorite stories involved the time Jack Benny refused to buy his tuna fish because he said they were too expensive.

But when all was said, Mike was a man’s man. For, not only did he smell too bad for any woman to go near him, but he preferred the company of his male companions. He could often be found in pubs by the docks having a laugh over a whiskey with some pals. Whether it was telling tales of big fish that got away; reminiscing about old friends; or frank discussions about the trend toward mid-calf flared hemlines, Mike felt right at home with his mates. His fishing friends used to say that they had seen tuna fish on the high seas that trembled at the mere mention of his name. One of his pals recalled, “There wasn’t a tuna fish alive who felt safe when Mike was a-sea.”

As the decade came to a close with WWII on the horizon, Mike courageously volunteered to serve in the Navy. Mike’s vast knowledge of tuna fish proved invaluable to the Allied command. Some said it was the crucial factor in determining the outcome of the Battle of Midway. Shortly thereafter, Mike was tragically killed when he was eaten by a giant clam.

History may never acknowledge Mike the tuna fish man for his accomplishments; but for those of us who knew him and who loved him, we will never forget this kind man of the sea.